Letters I'll Never Send

June 3, 2017 22:08

So I was reading your message again. 

The problem with me is that, I do not really know how to respond to compliments and show my gratitude towards something. I do not know how to respond whenever someone say good things about me. Although I say thank you, I feel that that alone is not enough — or I am just shy because I am not really used to those stuffs.

Your messages will always be my treasure, just like the other messages I have received from my friends and family. These will be all kept in my heart, always.

I do not know if I already told you but you are such a wonderful person. I know you are very private and I am just thankful with every single thing we had. Thank you for letting me into you life. Thank you for letting me know some of your parts — that now, all the flaws you have shared and shown me, they are now seen as something beautiful. Because it is part of you. The way who you are now. Even if I probably do not love you anymore, I sure, will still adore you. And that makes you insanely admirable. Not me.

There are a lot of moments where I found myself staring at you for a while and I thought, why is there a person in this world with such beautiful soul and is infront of me? How is this possible?

We are different, I could say, of course we are. But as you have told me, we are alike. I do believe that too, in some ways. So if probably, we fell apart and what you have said will come true, that the world will be setting up a grand plot for us, will you still look at me with those dazzling shinning eyes with wide smile and tight hug? Maybe that day, we'll be more open to each other, what we think of each other and all those stuff (something, probably, like, what we are).

I do not know until when, I do not know if this will stop but you have my heart. And I will wait. When time comes, maybe we can be or maybe I have moved on. We'll see, eventually.