Letters I'll Never Send

June 5, 2020 11:17

Hi,

I am writing to you again as Ben&Ben released their song entitled Lifetime yesterday at midnight. The one I was talking about in my previous letter. When I was listening to the song, my mind is blank, although with you and our memories in it. My heart felt sore, it felt like as if it was vibrating. 

I wanted to ask you this too, was there a lifetime waiting for us in a world where I was yours?

I think I will never know that because never mind, you were never mine.

But all I know is, the sight of you, oh, you were a good dream.

And of course, I was scared to lose you then, what do I do now that you've already left me alone?

It is true that buried feelings grow, just like with how I still love you. I remember vividly when we were tangled with another's eyes, the glimpse of me and you, with the warmth we had before, I just thought—was it the wrong time, what if we tried giving in a little more?

Just as how years have already passed, still, here I am as I'd spend a lifetime waiting in vain. Thinking, feeling, hoping for us to just to go back to the way we were before. 

I know I shouldn't ask because I know it will never then happened, but I can't help but think if is there a lifetime waiting for us?

You may not know, you may never know, but if there is a chance, I think you should know that I am still hoping that all this time, I have been yours.

While I'm speechless, that's all I can say. 

Please take care. You were really a good dream, someone I can never call mine.