flashback

one

PAGE ONE

This past summer, I took the time to realise I have to get out of here.
I would be leaving everything I know behind and starting over somewhere totally new but I just can't bear to stay in this town another week.
I've packed up all my belongings, I don't really have much and tomorrow I will be saying goodbye to my friends. Well not plural. My friend. Daisy Parker.

Daisy and I have been friends since we were seven and she's my best and basically only friend.
I have other people that I socialize with but I wouldn't consider them my friends.

There's Thomas Wilde, my chirpy and annoying work mate. He's only fifteen so I guess I can't blame his positive outlook on life. He probably hasn't even been through half of what I have, even though I have started experiencing these things long before I turned fifteen.

Thomas has a big fancy house and two parents who come for breakfast every Sunday and give generous tips. Usually to him only but I've gotten them once or twice.

Then there's Mandy Crawford. She's nineteen and lives next door to me. We really only talk when it comes to borrowing sugar or when we see eachother in the lobby. She lives with her boyfriend Cayden but I never really see him. He's twenty one and hardly ever leaves the apartment. Atleast not while I'm there. Which is hardly ever.
Mandy is sweet I guess but she has her own friends and as she would say, her 'aesthetic' it totally different to mine.
Apparently I'm more of an edgy girl and she is an artsy girl.

I wouldn't exactly say my style is edgy. Just because most of my clothes are dark it doesn't label me as a grunge goth girl. I like some bright colours. Like maybe purple and yellow. But not together in an outfit. That would be an absolute fashion disaster.

Today I'll be going to sort out some financial issues with my loser landlord. She's about 70 years old and she's a tough one. Mrs Merkel Mayham. She raised the rent twice the past four months and it keeps getting higher. You would think she would have mercy on an eighteen year old 'sweetheart' living alone and working double shifts just to cover rent but not at all. She's just an old bat.

I was promoted to manager at the cafe that I work at. Which reminds me I have to stop by there and pick up my last cheque. Thomas is probably going to be all sobby and try to convince me to stay but after I politely decline he will go back to his happy self.

I don't really get paid much but atleast I get free meals aswell so I don't really have to buy food. All I get is snacks because by the time I get home it's not very easy to fall asleep. So I illegally abuse my neighbours Wi-Fi and watch movies and well, have my snacks.

I'm so glad to be leaving this town. I got accepted into four different colleges and got scholarships into two of them. Washington state university and New York University. I'm going to New York.

Such a cliche for a young girl starting over in a big city all alone after moving from a small town.
Alcraft has been my home since forever but I can't stay here with all the bad memories.

My flashbacks are here again. Its like they're their own people that just come and go as they please. They make me relive the pain I felt all those times.
Atleast they don't attack me As bad as they did when I was in the foster homes. Everyone thought I was a freak but now I can control them slightly. When I last had them my therapist suggested I write about them in a diary. I do it whenever I get them now.

I hate my flashbacks.