You are the reason

What comes next

As the weeks went on, my stomach got bigger, my morning sickness got worse and I was eve more tired and kranky than usual. Thankfully, Chris was there every step of the way, taking care of me and making me feel better. The one thing I was annoyed about was the fact that he was constantly trying to restrict my duties, but I wasn't having any of it. Today, I was manning my station on the bridge, much to his annoyance.

"Captain, were detecting an unknown energy signature 1000 metres on our port side." Spock stated.

"Identify the source." Chris stated.

A few seconds later, Spock looked up at us.

"Its a cloaked ship sir. Its weapons are charged and they are scanning us."

"Shields up, red alert." Chris ordered.

Sirens started blaring and red flashing lights went off.

"Hail them."

I tensely sat, waiting to see if they responded. Suddenly, a shockwave hit the ship. I gripped my chair tightly and only just managed to stop myself falling.

"Report!" Chris ordered.

"A Klingon warbird has decloaked Captain." Spock stated.

My eyes widened. The war ended a year ago- why were they attacking us now?

"Hail them again." I said; jumping in before Chris could.

Another barrage of phaser fire hit the ship, knocking me to the floor. I landed hard on my stomach and hissed in pain.

"Megan!"

A strong pair of arms immediately scooped me up and sat me back in my chair. I looked up and met the mesmerising eyes of Chris.

"Are you alright?" he asked.

I nodded.

"They are responding to our hail Captain." Spock stated.

Chris turned around as an angry Klingon appeared.

"Surrender to the mercy of the Klingon Empire or die." He snapped.

"Sir, I'm Captain Christopher Pike of the USS Enterprise. I'm not sure if youre aware, but the war is over."

"What?" he asked.

He turned to me and said "Send him the proof."

I nodded and sent the evidence to the ship.

"The evidence you're looking at is our records from the war. It tells of how it ended last year thanks to the sacrifice of..."

Chris stopped, took a breath before continuing "of many brave Starfleet officers."

"Very well."

The transmission cut off and the ship retreated. I breathed a sigh of relief and allowed myself to relax. I suddenly felt something pooling in my pants and shooting pain went through my stomach. I discretely felt where the pooling was and was shocked to find blood when I pulled my hand back. I quickly hid it so Chris wouldnt see.

"If you'll excuse me Captain, I have an appointment to attend."

He nodded and I made a hasty exit to the turbolift. As soon as the turbolift doors closed and I programmed the destination, floods of tears poured out of my eyes. If I lost my babies, I would never forgive myself. I felt the turbolift stop, so I quickly composed myself before walking into sickbay. Dr. Boyce looked up and immediately rushed over.

"Megan, youre bleeding. What happened?" he asked as he led me to a biobed.

"During the attack- I fell onto my stomach." I said as I lay down.

He nodded and said "Alright, let me run some tests. Do you mind getting changed quickly?"

I nodded, changed into the hospital gown and lay down. Nerves began to build as the tests were run. I hoped and prayed that everything was ok. I watched as Dr. Boyce put down all his tools and looked at me sympathetically. I sat up, looking at him.

"I'm so sorry to have to tell you this Megan, but one of the babies no longer has a heartbeat."

My entire world crashed down in one single moment. One of my precious babies was dead. I couldn't even protect them long enough for them to be born. They never got to live the life I dreamed for them. I put a hand over my stomach and held it protectively while Phil cleaned me up. Once he was done and I'd got into the dressing gown he gave me, all I wanted to do was get out of there.

"Thank you Phil." I said before getting up and walking out.

"Megan, wait!" I heard him yell after me.

I decided to go straight to mine and Chris shared quarters. As soon as I got there, I locked the doors, got into bed and wrapped the covers around me. Time seemed to slow down as I lay there, unmoving. I couldnt bring myself to get up and face anyone knowing what a failure I was- I hadn't protected my babies well enough and now one of them was dead. I lay there in the dark, holding my stomach and thinking about the future. What would Chris think of me? Would he resent me? Will he want to leave me because of my failures? I suddenly heard someone trying to get in the door. I didnt move to answer it, nor did I care who it was. Light suddenly filled my eyes and a figure began walking towards me. As they sat down on the bed, I recognised them as Chris. He placed his hand on my upper arm.

"What happened today Megan? I spoke to Phil. He said you left sick bay in a hurry 6 hours ago and haven't been seen since then."

Had it really been 6 hours? It felt like so much longer to me.

"Talk to me Megan." He said.

I stayed quiet, not wanting to tell him. He suddenly got up and I felt the bed dip behind me. His strong arms then wrapped round me and pulled me closer to his chest. I could feel my walls breaking down and my resolve slipping away as he held me.

"You know I love you Megan, and I always will. Please tell me what's going on. I hate to see you like this." He whispered, kissing the top of my ear.

And that was it. Tears began to fall down my face as I gripped Chris tightly. He held onto me, whispering sweet nothings in my ear, reassuring me that he would always be there. After what seemed like an eternity, I finally stopped crying.

"Please Megan, talk to me."

I shook my head and said "You'll hate me if I tell you."

He rolled me over to face him and gently gripped my chin and made me look at him. His eyes were glistening with tears.

"I could never hate you. You're my wife and I love you with all of my heart."

I rested my head on his shoulder and took a breath.

"The babies, something happened." I whispered.

"What?" he asked.

"When I fell earlier- one of the babies died." I said; my voice breaking.

I watched as Chris' face fell and he brought our foreheads together.

"We'll get through this. I promise you." He whispered, bringing our lips together.

I immediately wrapped my arms around him and kissed back. I then knew that no matter what life would throw at us, Chris would always be with me and nothing would tear us apart.