Mine not Mine

Seventeen

If this is just only a dare, why does it feel so real?
~~~

With my finger on my lips as I am staring at them at the mirror, I cannot stop not to recall what happened last night. It still feels like a dream to me.

His lips were on mine for 10 seconds. Ten damn seconds that felt like even longer. What have I done that heaven's favor fell on my hands this time? Did the deities finally hear my prayer after so long?

That was my first kiss. I never had kissed someone before and haven't even kissed by someone else either — oh well, because I never had that 'kiss-the-bride' kind of moment when we signed the marriage certificate.

It's a shame that all I have done was just to stare at him with my big wide eyes for 10 seconds and didn't even reciprocated his kiss. Can I go back and repeat that scene? It seemed like I had forgotten what was written in the script. Ugh. I beg for one more retake and I will do it better. Promise.

Ten damn seconds, I wasn't even able to breathe — literally, I should've already been declared dead. My mind can't still forget the scene and even the feelings it left on me. Now that my lips have had the taste of him, I can't deny that I want it even more and  I will never have enough of it.

With my mind consumed with this thought, I suddenly heard a knock that is continuously growing louder. I flashed the toilet bowl although I didn't actually use it and open the door just to see Allia standing in front of me already.

Allia still looking drunk from last night, looks at me with disgust in her eyes as insultingly pushed me off her way by her shoulder. Without even saying sorry, she closed this aircraft lavatory. As much as I want to get a little revenge, I ignored her instead.

Oh, I have almost forgotten to tell you the dare she had had. I was just so consumed with the thought of Askel and I that is why I have totally forgotten about her.

So this is her dare — drink 5 bottles of beer. Without any complaint, she took the five bottles of beer and drank it. They were actually so concerned about her and told her that she could call a friend if she couldn't drink it all herself but she didn't listen to them instead she finished it all by herself. Finally, without even leaving a drop of beer in the bottle, she blacked out and was carried to her room.

We should have already been back to our houses if our departure time wasn't changed to 3:30 in the afternoon when we were supposed to leave at 9 in the morning just because Allia was still asleep.

Until now no one still dared to speak whatever happened last night. No one asked Aksel why he kissed me. The party-like atmosphere in this plane the day we left turned to be burial-like-moment right now. Everyone is quiet and that is even more frightening than hearing their loud noises!

Jett who's wearing his eye-mask is quietly sleeping while the earphones are plugged into his ears. I wasn't able answer his question last night but I think he already got the answer. I feel bad that I have caused him pain when all this time he has been so good to me. It is really painful to like someone but doesn't like you in return. I think I understand it now.

Although, he didn't mention to me the confession he made when we went back to our room after that I can still feel that he's hurt to see me and Aks ki—. Aks didn't even speak about it at all even though I'm dying to hear his explanation. He left me hanging with an unanswered question in my mind the moment he pulled his lips away.

I keep myself busy with the magazine I have in my hands and tried to push any thought of him off my mind when I heard the pilot announced that we're about to land in 5 minutes.

Five minutes. Five more minutes. I need to keep myself busy a little longer. I pulled another magazine from the seat pocket.

Flipping the pages, my eyes got so bored to see nothing interesting at all. But, because I need to keep myself looking busy, I continue flipping the pages. Finally! I stopped the moment my eyes caught an interesting article about Aksel.