NASIEKU: MAFIA ROMANCE

2: Loving Wrong

"A lot of water has passed under the bridge, Mike," I mumbled deep in thoughts breaking the silence between us. It was almost dusk now, I'm not sure how long we had been sitting at the wooden bridge.

"It surely has, Nas." He upheld.

"He never said goodbye that's why I've held on to the hope that he will come back for two years."

"Two years is such a long time, but that shows how deeply adept of loving you are." He said running his hand up and down my back slowly.

"I wish he left me an inkling on why he decided to simply abandon me like that." I sounded dismal.

"Sometimes love is not enough reason for someone to stick with us, I'm sorry he left that way."

"If love is not enough reason to stick with someone then what is?" The pain in my chest was growing more unbearable.

I initially reckoned love was enough reason to want to stick with somebody, that it was sufficient to want to fight for your love and for those who you love.

"For some people, they need more," Mike asserted.

"I gave him my all. I didn't have anything more left to give. So my all was not sufficient for him?" I polled, the question was directed more to myself.

When you give your all and its not adequate for them, something inside you is altered.

"There must be a substantial reason why he left," He countered.

"What could possibly be the reason?" I retorted, I felt like the pain in my chest would tear me apart.

He stared at me sympathetically, "Only he can answer that."

"Right, I'm going to find him, I need answers," I declared.

I was going to embark on this journey to find Robin. I could not just give up on what we had so easily. What if he did not leave willingly?

He might be in trouble.

But how could I know that he wanted to be found?

How was I even going to find him?

There was a lump in my throat and my head was throbbing.

"When does the pain stop?" I inquired, tears burned down my cheeks making my vision blurry.

"It gets better with time." He encouraged.

"Time has not to help drown my sorrows, if anything, it has only helped me learn how to conceal pain from others," I muttered, knowing well those words held more meaning to me than Mike could understand.

"Allow yourself to go through the process fully, don't hold your self back. If you feel like crying, please let those tears out regardless of who is watching. And if you ever need a shoulder to cry on I'm here for you Nas," He promised, cupping my cheeks and wiping my tears with his thumb.

'Okay, thanks," I whimpered, it felt good to confide in him, after all.

"You are so beautiful, Nas. Everything about you is fascinating, believe me. Any man in his right mind would never leave that behind." He uttered intertwining his hand with mine.

"Thank you," I muttered.

"Never process negative thoughts towards yourself again, okay?" He said bringing my hand to his lips for a kiss.

"Thank you for listening to me ramble." I felt sad but comforted.

"It's not rambling Nas, it's called expressing your feelings," Mike endorsed trying to make me feel better.

"Okay, thank you for listening to me express my feelings," I said feeling less sad now.

"Don't mention it. Anytime you need to talk I'll be here for you." He said smiling down at me.

His smile was contagious.

"Thank you, you are so kind," I said smiling back at him.

"See, I made you smile. You have a really beautiful smile, Nas." He said, placing his index finger under my chin and tilted my head to look at him. His brown eyes bore into mine and I saw a perk of desire. He stroked and caressed my lips with his thumb slowly and tenderly.

I peeked at his lips and I was convinced he bit his bottom lip out of pure reflex.

My eyes fluttered closed as I tried to mask his effect on me. Before I could understand what was going on, I felt his warm breath close to my lips and I could tell his pink luscious lips were only inches from mine. I was aware of the fact that the moment his lips crashed on mine I would not be able to resist him.

I forced my eyes open the same time his lips almost crashed mine. I swiftly placed my finger on his lips to prevent them from touching mine.

"Stop," I said more harshly than I intended.

He stopped immediately and looked at me searching for expression.

Pain.

I heard him curse under his breath.

"I'm sorry Nas. Please forgive me. I'm not trying to take advantage of you at your weakest. I'm sorry, okay?" He apologised, his face full of earnestness.

I just nodded in understanding.

Moments of cessation followed, both of us deep in thoughts, lost in our own worlds.

I could not help but think back to all the time Robin and I had spent at this wooden bridge. We shared our first kiss at this bridge, he had made a lot of promises too. He had even prophesied his unending love for me here.

How can you forget someone who gave you so much to remember?

"Can I take you home now?" Mike inquired softly, startling me and pulling me out of my reminiscent.

"Yeah, thanks" I simply replied.

He stood and offered me his hand. He wrapped his arm around my wrist and gently pulled me to my feet. We walked back to his car silently.

I wanted to move on, I really did. I wanted all the scars to heal but the more I wished to get out of that hole the more gravity pulled me back.

This talk with Mike had lessened the pain but for how long until the pain came back crashing me down?

I inferred only one way of survival.

The blade.

***

Thank you for reading, please vote and comment it will mean the world to me.

Xoxo❤️🖤