Salvation (Depressed Hinata fanfic)

Chapter 7

I'm dying

Hinata's pov

     2 weeks. It's been 2 weeks since I told Suga and Daichi the truth. Since then, they are overprotective and always tell me to take it easy. My father, I dunno why, hadn't touched me since then. Everything is fine but weird. And I don't like that. I could walk without limping, I could jump without feeling the blood drip from my cuts and I could wear again T-shirts and shorts. It feels like a dream. But everything must come to an end.
During these weeks, I avoided talking to Shou. It seemed like he wanted to tell me something, but I couldn't find the courage to face him after that night. He should have been hating me, not eager to talk to me. I am confused. Is he a sadist? Nah, my sweet little brother isn't like that.
Back to the main topic, I am healed completely. I have a lot of scars, but now, with my senpai's support, I think they are a symbol of my power. I feel everything will be fine. I will be fine. Maybe I should visit Shouma's grave. Honestly, I have never been there. Mom didn't want me and Shou see something that could leave us with trauma. Too late. Now, I want to go there. No. I need to go there. I need to apologize. I need to tell him I didn't mean it. I need to tell him I will buy all the ice cream he wants in our next lives. And, the most important is to promise him they are happy. I am sure he hates me. A small smile appears on my face as I am walking slowly towards home. Even thou he didn't beat me in two weeks, I can't risk anything.
  In front of my house, I closed my eyes and prayed. Everything will be ok. I am sure of it. Slowly, I opened the door and said "I'm home!". I started confused as a tall man stood in front of me. Behind him were my father and another 2 men. What is going on?
  "Guys, this is my ungrateful son. The one who told his classmates lies and the one who made my wife and child run." Father said these words with tears running down his face. What?
  Suddenly, my back hit the wall as one of the men grabbed me from my collar and held me in the air.
  "How dare you! How dare you ruining your old man's family? You need a lesson." A preppy smile appeared on his face, as his friends came closer. Oh shit. I need to run.
  Before I could make another move, I felt a sharp pain in my stomach. I felt the metallic taste of blood in my mouth as I gasped for air and tried to protect myself. It didn't work. The man threw me on the floor and removed his belt from his jeans. Others grabbed bottles of wine. Damn it. They started hitting me. The punches were coming from every direction and, as I tried to shout for help, my father choked me. I'm dying. I feel my word spin and the black abyss come closer. Before I could faint, he let me breathe. He smiled at me as he shoved his member in my mouth. When did he undressed? Tears were running down my face and I felt like I will puke soon. The others stopped and made me grab their things. Ewww. I am raped by a bunch of strangers. A great method to end my life.
Abruptly, all my clothes disappeared and they penetrated me. I felt as I got ripped in half. I tried to run away, but my father started to hit me with a bottle of beer. I felt dizziness take over me, as blood was flowing from my wounds and as my insides were filled with these men semen. Soon after that, my world got black.

  I woke up. I was sitting on the floor and dad was smoking on the couch. I tried to get up, but my hand slipped on something warm. I looked down. Blood. My blood. My eyes got on my body. It was covered in bruises, scars, teeth marks and cuts. Fortunately, the blood dried. I looked at my father. He was smiling.
"First, my son is a murder. Then, he is a liar. And now, he became a slut. How proud I am!" He said laughing hysterically. I felt my blood boiling. He is crazy.
"It is all your fault. If you didn't tell your friends about your conditions, nothing will have happened. So, congratulations! This shows how weak and useless you are. You should have died that day, fagot. Now, disappear from my eyes! Jump in a river or something." He said as he grabbed my bruised arm and threw me in my room. He is right. It is all my fault. I am a piece of shit and a weakling. I destroy everyone's lives just by being alive. Maybe he is right. I should just die. Nobody will suffer anymore. I won't suffer anymore. The hell could not be worse than my life. I looked at my ceiling. The tears began dripping from my eyes. I am done. Now I realized that I was slowly dying and I only needed the courage to end it. Now I have it. I need to end it. This way, it will get better. Maybe father will become like in the past. Mother and brother can be happy with their new family, knowing that the one who destroyed their lives won't be there to commit more sins. Everything sounds...wonderful. I got up, ignoring the pain from my body and the white stuff dripping from my hole. I get dressed and left the house slowly. I didn't sense anything around me. I didn't bring my bag. I won't go to school. I only had one direction. The cliff on the other side of the town. Finally, everything will be over. Everyone will be happy. I still have a lot of regrets and wishes, but I don't deserve anything. I am a murderer and a sinner.
  Without noticing, I was standing in front of the cliff. I looked down. The black abyss looked like he was smiling at me. He shouted loudly 'Jump! Jump and the paradise will come!'. I lessened the distance. One more step. I am sorry brother. I killed you. I am sorry mother. I disappointed you. I am sorry team. I can't join you at the nationals. Good luck. I am sorry, Suga and Daichi. I promised I will come to you if I need help. But this is beyond your powers. I looked at the sky and smiled. I don't deserve forgiveness, but I am still craving for it. How silly of me. I was about to walk into the abyss when a voice made me flinch and shiver.
  "Hinata, no!"
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  Important!  Hey guys! Thank you so much for over 200 readers. I was thinking about adding a ship to my story. So, who do you want to save Hinata: Kageyama or Tsukishima?
Another thing. Today, where I am, it is Easter. I think for most of you it already was this sacred day, but I still wanted to say it. Happy Easter guys! I hope you stay in your house and that you are happy and healthy. See you next week.