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Thunder shook the room and rattled the window of the ostentatious hospital. Lightning flashed white light blindingly and the rain pattered roughly on the rooftop. Sierra lay on the couch, within the resting quarters of the department, soaking herself in her feelings. Countless of sighing, the thoughts in her mind fumbled her— still wondering where she should go.
For once I could choose something that makes me happy, but I keep on pondering that it's wrong.
"I've heard some rumours..."
Sierra heard two voices and she could distinguish it from the new residents.
She manoeuvres her body, facing the pillows of the couch.
The residents saw her body causing them to slowly piped down their voices, yet Sierra could still hear them gossiping.
"Who's the mysterious guy though? Is it really The Kim Taehyung?"
"I'm not sure— you have to take an account that the initials are quite common."
Sierra was dazed to hear Taehyung's name from them. Her body lightly jolted to sit down; making the two stunned, zipping their mouths quickly, perceptive enough that they'd disturbed their sunbae.
The tall guy and the brown-haired woman took action immediately greeting and telling Sierra they were sorry for waking her up, "It's okay, don't worry." She reassured them, while quietly twitching herself wanting to ask what they were talking about.
Is this the Kim Taehyung I know?
She can't out win her curiosity.
"I have a question, what were you guys talking about?"
The brown-haired woman promptly marched up to become near Sierra and showed her phone.
"The mysterious KTH looks like on a date!! Will this relationship bloom??!"
Seeing the headline which was posted hours ago, it didn't dispatch any name— only one specific person's initials. The imagery consists of a lady and a man who's opening the door so that the lady can sit next in front of the driver's seat, however, the picture itself was drastically motion blurred.
Her heart thumped— it was them.
Despite the picture was vague, she knew it's the exact scenario portrayed in the photograph happened months ago, when they both saw each other by chance, in Daegu City.
Her throat got dry, initiating her to gulp.
This post brought a surging rush of memories into her mind, the meet-ups they've had together— what if someone followed them and took pictures?
Is Taehyung alright?
She returned the phone to the owner while thanking her, the two residents bid their goodbyes so they could continue their own duties, she as sunbae could only cheer them up "Fighting."
When they left the place she plumped her body on the couch— the infamous guilt crept boldly in her mind.
Why am I being such a burden?
The guilt keeps on shitting her mind, on and off. There would be a time she couldn't help but believe that she also deserves to be happy and follow what she loves. But then again there would be days where she fears herself and feels like she needs to live out the punishment for the reason of what she has done.
Hurting Yunoh like that.
Obviously she's frightened of binding on to something more. She tries to stop her feelings and be in-denial in spite of recognizing herself, she does like being with him— there's no moment of being dull, the time would pass by completely and unknowingly.
But at this specific moment, she also realized the consequence of letting herself indulge with her own feelings towards him and might affect Taehyung in things she can't even comprehend.
it terrifies her— she doesn't want to hurt him too.
Guilt was unwaveringly creeping around and it retained taunting her within the harsh rainstorms residing in this woman.
Sierra snapped out of her mind and got back to reality when she heard Jiahn and Yikyung voices."Why do you look sick?" Jiahn went closer to her friend, worriedly. Yikyung mentioned "I think you should go home for the day." seeing her friend up close in person.
"I don't know what to do— I don't know what to think!" her voice cracks, surprising the two friends with the sudden reaction she had, tears were building in the side of her eyes.
"Is this about your issues and your feelings towards the guy?"
She nodded weakly.
They've been suspecting Sierra what causes her mind to distresses— she's been like this for consecutive weeks, trying her best to conceal but the two good friends can see her vividly, and now this situation supported their hunch making it true and valid, both of them were just waiting for Sierra to open up about her concerns.
The commitment issues that she thought has been resolved rose back up just like a snap of a finger.
"I'm lost and confused with my feelings and I don't like it."
"There's always will be reasons for all of this frustration. It's hard, but you know that's part of the process, so don't get too hard on yourself; it's okay to feel these emotions." Jiahn started off as she patted Sierra's back lightly, calming her. Yikyung agreed by nodding her head "People suffer, be confused and have pain, but they don't stop loving...."
Sierra sniffs, controlling her state of emotions and paying attention to her friends, both Yikyung and Jiahn don't know who this particular guy was but Sierra was the main priority here. Honestly, they would eventually know who the person is when she finally becomes firm and ready as he and Sierra would have a chance to take things seriously.
Jiahn breathes, smiling softly to her dear friend "You just have to make it worth it."
"Sohee I want you to remember, you don't need to rush yourself— take your time. But you have to be honest towards him and to yourself, then other things will come along." Yikung reassured her unnie, while patting her head softly.
No matter how much she wonders, believing will lead to her right path.
The soft hours prolong as they've kept on talking to each other, while also cheering up Sierra, making a goal to let her smile and laugh produced by her.
Within Sierra's tiny unknown voice that wants to break free, acknowledges if something will happen at any rate she hopes to admit her feelings and maybe someday have a relationship with him when the universe has her back.
