IF ONLY---I COULD FORGIVE MYSELF

Chapter 1

They had spent the afternoon together, trying to clear the air. But to Sanem, their air was much too thick and dark to be cleared. Yes, she had lied again but it was to save him and to protect the company. She would do it all again in order to save him; she did it because she loved him. He had made up his mind without hearing her explanation. Can was determined to leave on his new assignment without even trying to understand. He had promised to always take care of her heart... always listen to her... but, ...he lied.

She wondered why he wanted her to accept what he was doing. He had already decided to leave, So why did it matter what she thought about it. For months she had endured insults and humiliation from Polen, Huma and Ceyda and he turned a blind eye to it all. Can telling her she broke their connection by selling her scent to Fabri was the most hurtful. What about her? What about their love? Was she nothing more than a scent to him?

His words had stung her heart and she wasn't sure if she would be able to forgive him. He was under some impression that they could part as friends. Sanem let him know he was completely free to return to his previous life and his ex-girlfriend, Polen. After all, Polen was the one that had secured the job position for him and convinced him to take the job.

After a while, the whole situation was beginning to become to much for Sanem and she needed desperately to put an end to it. She saw he was determined to have it his way, so she finally agreed to remain friends with him. It seemed to be the only way for them to be able to go their separate ways.

"Can, I'm sorry for all that has happened, and take complete responsibility for everything." she gushed. "I have brought you pain and that was something that I never intended to do. I knew undoubtedly how you felt about secrets and lies. I understand your need to leave and distance yourself from me. I truly believe that we both have caused enough pain to one another." Sanem struggled with her words trying to hold on to all her emotions as tightly as she could and get through yet another lie that she has been forced to tell. "This will be the perfect opportunity for us to find ourselves again and for you to regain the lifestyle that means so much to you"

He was relieved, but not completely convinced that she being truthful with him. They came to an agreement to remain friends and to keep in touch while he was on his travels. He told her the problems they had as a couple were not entirely her fault and they should take this time to forgive each other. Time would cure everything, maybe even his broken heart....

Can emphasized to her that she needed to continue working at the agency; she had such talent for it. If she wanted to publish her book, it could be done from there. He didn't like the thought of her working with Yigit. Can was sure that Yigit had more than a business attachment to her and he felt uneasy about it. Of course, he told himself that this came from a friend's point of view. He would always feel like he needed to protect Sanem.

The drive home was solemn and quiet. She was just hanging by a thread and ready to end the relationship. Every emotion and feeling pulsed throughout her body. Her emotions needed somewhere to escape.

Once they arrived at her house, Can tried to talk to her about his itinerary and all the events to follow his arrival in London. Trying to make small talk, almost as if he didn't want the night to end. But Sanem had heard enough as she tried to cut the conversation short. 

Her heart was screaming,  "Why are you doing this? Please, let me go!" After what seemed like an eternity, she was able to stepped from the car and gave Can one final, but quick goodbye.

Can couldn't believe she had agreed so quickly and was so quick to say her goodbyes, but he was sure that they would talk in a few days and things would be better. After all, she was still the most important person in his life. 

Hello everyone! This is a new story for EK fans. Hope you enjoy! Please vote and comment. Follow me and I appreciate all the readers!