𝕴 𝖉𝖔𝖓'𝖙 𝖑𝖔𝖛𝖊 𝖞𝖔𝖚 ~ Regulus black x reader

11

I'm a huge mcr fan and I also used this song to chose the new title of the book <3

~~~~~~

I was alone, I didn't mind, it was calm, peaceful, dark. yet still, I was restless. my mind pounded, a pulsing consuming headache. all I could focus on was my breathing, not the racing thoughts as the flew through my brain. I didn't want to, it was too stressful, I just wanted it to end. no home, no friends, no life. More importantly, if I wanted to I couldn't, my body was stiff as a bloody board, paralyzed. 

Occasionally I would hear the faint weeping of a person, the warm lingering of a hand in my own. but I knew for a fact the one person I wanted hadn't come once. I missed him, his raven black hair, sparkling eyes, always cast in a glare. his perfect essence he wore everywhere, commanding a room with ease.  just thinking about it eased me, for a short while at least. but in the excruciating week, I've been stuck in this bloody bed, he's not come to see me once.

maybe it was for the best, now I don't have to worry for anyone except myself and James of course. maybe, being alone was what I needed.

 My finger twitched, fuck, that hurt. 

I needed to do this. 

I clenched my fist and opened my eyes. the bright white lights of the hospital wing welcomed me. it was a blinding pain as I flinched. my whole body ached horribly. the simplest movements as blinking pained me. 

"shes awake!" there was distinct chaos as Madam Pomfrey rushed over to me, clutching several vials of potions. 

"Hello dear, how are you feeling?" I groaned happy people frustrated the hell out of me, and now I have to deal with her for t least a fuckin week? might as well have just stayed asleep!

"I'm sore all over. I've been here a week, I fell off my broom and I'm assuming you want me to drink those" I gestured towards the vials she held. she just nodded a sour look on her face, I did my best to stop my smirk. I softened my tone when I spoke again,

"has, uh, my brother been in?" I swished the murky contents of a vial around, watching it slide over the glass. I downed it and winced at the tase

"oh yes, the potter boy and the other troublemakers, they tried to steal you out of here you know! they've been in every bloody day, foolish boys never left" she smiled a little, "they clearly care for you dear" I smiled mostly to myself as she walked away. her retreating footsteps echoing in the room.

I quickly downed the rest of the bottles wincing as I went, I sat in silence for a while, the bright white walls still piercing my vision. I heard rapid footsteps and glanced at the door. just as I expected, there in the doorway stood my Brother and his rambunctious pack of idiots. 

"so, kidnapping didn't work huh?" He smiled widely and ran over embracing me in a hug. I winced "merlins tits" he let go and looked at me, "right, right, no swearing" he laughed,

"I missed you" his smile brightened as he spoke,

"I missed you too, all of you" I smiled a rare thing in itself. Sirius jumped slightly, 

"oh yeah, so" he pulled something out from behind his back, it was my beloved leather jacket, it was tattered and ruined, soaked and torn to shreds. I gasped and tears welled in my eyes "this happened when you fell in the lake, also your boots are absolutely dead, we hand to throw them out"

"the boots are fine, but my baby, my child, my prized fucking possession" A tear fell from my eye. I flipped down onto the stiff bed and let out a dramatic sigh, "I have no will to live"

"We assumed that would be the case so..." Remus pulled something from behind the bedside table, I tried to look over and see what it was, I gasped loudly and covered my mouth.

"HOLY SHIT HOLY FUCKING SHIT YOU GUYSSSS" I jumped forwards and hugged all four of the boys tightly. 

In Remus's hands was a basket, three leather jackets were visible, one with a belt and high poped collar, a matte black one and one exactly identical to my previous one. Placed on top of it there was also a pair of boots an exact replica to the ones that were ruined. filling the empty space was a load of my favourite sweets and chocolates. I squealed and leaned back into the bed again,

"thank you guys so so much, I love you all!" they all smiled and James pulled me into a headlock

"aweee I love you too sis" he messed up my hair and smirked smugly, I yelped in fear,

"AH! not my hair you bitch!" all the boys laughed as I glared and flattened out my back hair. I was still laughing with the boys when another set of lighter footsteps could be heard. in the doorway was what shocked me most. a puffy-eyed, tear-stained regulus starred me down in shock. 

"R-reg?" He started to walk forwards

"Y/n... when did you wake up?" 

"today" I looked around awkwardly, all the boys looked uncomfortable, except for Sirius who looked as always as if he had no care in the world. 

"um, guys, would you mind if we had a minute to talk" I paused "alone?" they all nodded and stood, James kissed me of the forehead, Sirius squeezed my hand reassuringly before they all left. now I was alone, just me, to face my worst fears.

"Reg" I took a deep breath and hid my shaking hands, "I think we should break up" I looked up from my lap to see him, his face turned into one of pure shock.

"Y/n/n, I, Please, Why? Give me another chance" I shook my head firmly as tears burned my eyes for the second time that day.

"no reg, you've been ignoring me since the start of the year, you and everyone else, I-i can't be in a relationship like that. I was alone. all summer. and every day I thought about you, you plagued my thoughts, I cared so much, but as soon as I did something you didn't agree with you turned your back on me" I was once again staring at my lap. I knew I probably looked like a mess, my greasy hair and hospital gown, no makeup and tear-stained pale face. but I didn't care.

"I think you should go" he nodded slowly and looked at the ground,

'I'll always love you" those were the words that echoed in my mind, the question was, did I love him too? the words were caught in my throat, I didn't have a chance to say anything at all if I could at he ran from the scene. my mind was deranged but all I could think of were the words of  familiar song...

"I don't love you like I did, yesterday"