Phat Is Me Honey (Complete and Slowly being edited)

Phat Is Me Chapter 23 (urban)

Just know I love yall dearly, thanks for hold me down for real. I'm almost done with the one shot. Once I finish I'm goint to annouce the winner of the one shot. Dont forget to comment, vote and tell another, friend to tell another friend to read, vote and comment.

I love yall,

ZanBoo

            I just looked at Jayceon. Honestly I don’t know what to say.

“I’m going to be honest with you; I don’t know how to let you help me. I’ve keep to myself so long. I’ve been to therapy, lived in a mental intuition for a little. Everything is always ok for a second and then it all comes crashing down. I really don’t know what to tell you so that you can help me.” I bit my lip.

“There was even a time when I didn’t trust God. For me it’s hard, I’m trying, I really am I just need time, and to be honest I feel like your rushing me. When you asked me to be your girl friend you knew what you were walking into. I tried to warn you, but you’re so damn hardheaded.”

Jayceon shook his head and chuckled, “I’m not trying to rush you into anything. I just asked how I could help you. If this is your way of trying to push me away you’re doing a bad job at it,” he moved closer to me.  “I’m not going nowhere, and the sooner you realize that we can move to the next step of our relationship. If you keep playing me for the other nigga you were with, you will never heal. I know your hurt but some shit you have let go so you can move on with your life. It doesn’t get easier until you let it.”

“Well I don’t know how to do that. I lost the most important people in my life and to just forget them is not easy. When you lose children nothing is life is easy. Jayceon I already feel bad because I didn’t want them at first, but once I had them I feel in love. All the things that Keith put me through felt like they were worth it. Seeing their faces everyday made me happy. After they died I was never the same. Not only did he kill them, but he did it in front of me. He wanted to see the pain on my face. My pain was for his enjoyment, watching them get killed  hurt more than getting raped and being beat on, I’m so broken I don’t want to be fixed.” Tears were running down my face.

Jayceon looked at me for a second and shook his head. “I’m with you because you’re a fighter; I’m with you because I see that you’re broken, but you still push on. I understand you’re hurt Beautiful, but you got to get out of the victim state. If you keep settling there you are going to continue to be the same broken ass person. I’m not telling you this to make you even more hurt and angry, Im telling you because you need to fix it, I need you to let this mental block of, ‘if I’m happy, then sooner or later it’s going to be taken away from me.’ Sometime you have to go through the hard days to get to the good ones.” He hugged me.

**** ***** ****** ******* ***** ***** ***** ****** ***** ***** ***** ****** ******

The last couple of days have been good, I told Jayceon about most of my past. He doesent need to know everything, well at least not at the moment. I’m still trying to get him to tell me about his pass but he keeps say, “Lets work on one problem at a time.” The nigga aint fooling me though, I know he’s just stalling. But its cool I am not going to press him about it right now. I did talk to his “aunt” when she brought Kam back, she is nice as hell. He doesn’t like when I talk to her, but until he gives me a good reason not to, I’m going to keep talking to her. I mean that my best guy friends’ mother, I am surprised that I never met her before as long as me and Lyfe have been friends. I remember the first day we met like it was yesterday.

Flash back

I was chillin at the park with Kim, watching the guys play basketball and this one guy kept looking over at us.