Trauma

I suck at conversations

My mouth wouldn't make words. I wanted to tell him so badly but I was too scared to say anything. "Come on Dipper." I told myself. "Stop being so weak! Its not that big of a problem!" My mouth was open but nothing was coming out of it. I couldn't put it into words. So I decided to start slowly as I began to mess with my hands and taking a sudden interest in my feet. 

"I....I've been having...n-nightmares lately and....and i think....no I know....I know that...b-bill caused them and.. and I don't know what to do I feel like I'm going insane.." I shut my eyes and wrapped my arms around myself as if trying to comfort myself.

I wished I'd brought Mabel down here. She had made it so much more comforting when we had told Wendy and Pacifica. But it was said and there was nothing I could do to change it. Mabel was right. I needed to talk to someone who knew I wasn't crazy. And Ford was the perfect person to talk to.

Ford sat and thought for a few more seconds until he said "Was this the reason you were in the Hospital yesterday?" I nodded. "The only other people who know besides Mabel are Pacifica and Wendy. I just felt like you were the perfect person to talk to about this."

Ford stood "Well then my boy, you came to the right place. Come on. Let's go for a walk."

---------------------------TIME SKIP BROUGHT TO YOU BY FLAFLES----------------------------------  

(By the way, this next part is based off of a comic I saw on Pinterest a while ago which I'm too lazy to find and put on here XD. But ya. This ain't come from ma brain. It's mixed with original and something I saw.) (Editor Liz here! Having now gotten my hands on Journal 3, I realized that the comic I saw was actually a scene from the journal. But ima keep it because its cute)

Me and Ford walked to the hill where it looked over the floating cliffs and the rest of the town of Gravity Falls. Being up there made me feel peaceful. The wind was light but made the warm day cool. The sun was starting to go down.

We were sitting on the grass looking at the town from above. "This is where I always went to clear my mind." Ford said. I nodded "It really does calm you down. It's peaceful too."

I wanted to close my eyes but it seemed every time I tried to close my eyes, bad stuff happened so I didn't.

Ford looked at me. "Do you feel safe?" I nodded. "Good. Now Dipper, I can say that bad things are ahead because I've experienced what your going through. Just don't make my mistakes. If you need to talk to someone, you can count on your family. Don't push them away like I did. Remember that we are here for you and support you."

I looked down and took off my hat (Sorry I haven't mentioned this before. But I feel like Wendy and Dipper would trade hats. So right now he has his Pine Tree hat.) And started to play with it.

"Mason" I said. Ford looked confused. "That's my real name. I don't like saying it that much. Mostly because of twin stereotypes. It gets on my nerves. Besides, even when I corrected the bullies at my school they would still call me Dipper so like, why bother. You know?" He patted my head. "I know." "Just please don't tell anyone." He chuckled. "Your secrets safe with me."

We walked back to the Shack when it got dark. Mabel was going to have a sleepover tonight with all of her friends including Wendy and Pacifica. Which meant I had to survive hours of high pitched squeals. But then again, Wendy should keep things under control.