Beautiful Goodbye (punk luke hemmings fanfic)

"I still feel numb"

10th of December                                                                                                                     03:21

It's been 6 months, 2 weeks and a few days since i've started seeing a psychiatrist. I didn't want to, but my parents thought i should see one, at least once a week. I went, and honestly i don't feel better. I still feel numb, i still don't feel anything except for sadness. He gave me this journal the first time i went there, but i always said i wouldn't need him but lately i've been having the need to talk to someone, but i don't wanna talk to my family or friends because i don't want them to know that i don't feel better. I used to have him.. We used to talk for hours, sometimes we used to talk all night long. But he's not here anymore. When he left, I hated him, as soon as the notice arrived and after i cried my eyes out for him, i figured out i hated him. I hated him because he left me alone, he was the one that would break me but he was also the one who could fix me.. I always heard that you couldn't be fixed by the same person who broke you, but with him was different. I still can't believe i'm going through this because of him, i still can't believe he's not around anymore.. I miss him so much, i want him back. I used to be so happy.. I still remember the day we met. I was with the guys and a tall bonde dude, with tattoos and piercings approached us. He seemed cocky, but i had to admit that his cologne took my breath away.. Even though it was mixed with cigarettes it was still so good. I didn't liked him at first, actually. I thought he was the typical fuckboy, you know? He would bang a different girl, every night. And it actually was that way for the first 7 months. He was so rude, he had an horrible temper, everything had to go the way he liked it or else he would snap. Everyone around town was afraid of him. I didn't knew why, but 2 years later i found out everything.. He was mean but at the same time he was the sweetest boy on earth. People still talk about him. The day after he left, everyone on school said he got what he deserved. I couldn't handle it, so i left and went to our secret place. I still go there everyday to see if he comes.. But he never does. I miss him.

SECOND CHAPTERRRRRR, IF YOU LIKE IT GIVE A "THUMBS UP", THANK YOU SO MUCHHHHH FOR READING XX