I go upstairs. I'm all alone in the house. I'm so tired, I need to go to sleep. But as hard as I try, I can't...I just lie there, imaging Spero's tiny body. I remember the horrible feeling of seeing him or her that morning in the hotel room. And now how must Lisa be feeling, so sick, struggling to breathe AND knowing that her baby is gone. Gone, forever.
I get up and go into the bathroom, staring at my reflection the mirror. I have to take my shot. I get a needle out, fill it with the medicine and quickly inject it into my stomach. Ow. That never gets any easier. But then I look at myself, and think, It's your fault that Lisa went to the store and got sick. You were the one who permitted her to do it. You should've just gone yourself. You are a horrible monster and you deserve the pain. I look at myself. Yes. I deserved the pain of the shot and deserve more. I should feel just as much pain as Lisa feels right now. With her baby gone. I reach into the side drawer of our cabinet and get out my razor. Without thinking, I draw it across my skin. Ow. That hurts. But I do it again, because I deserve the pain. I mindlessly dig it in to my skin and begin to cry- not because it hurts- no because I just killed my sister's baby. I look down and am horrified, there is blood all over the floor. I didn't realize I did that much. I quickly use toilet paper to wipe up the floor and clean my cuts, then put bandages on them. Nobody can ever know about this. Inside I feel a little guilty because I know if my sisters or Nick ever found out about this they wouldn't allow it, but suddenly, I feel so much more calm. There, I hurt myself. I deserved it. I'm okay, and no one has to know about this. Wow, I'm glad I tried. it stings but it was worth feeling much better about myself!
I lay down in bed and this I'm so tired that I immediately fall asleep.
WHOA! TWO CHAPTERS IN TEN MINUTES. I'M ON FIRE, BUT SERIOUSLY I REALLY GOTTA GO DO HOMEWORK. I'LL PROBABLY UPDATE TONIGHT :) VOTE OR COMMENT PLEASE!
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Corona Virus in The Cimorelli Household (A Cimorelli FanFic)
General FictionThe girls and their parters quarantine together until one of them is forced to go out and get exposed to Corona virus and from there it's all downhill! New Chapters every: Monday, Wednesday, Friday, and Sunday!
