Until the End of Time

25

August 20, 1994

Being 18 weeks pregnant was nerve-wracking simply because she was still early on in her tour and she did the Edge walk every night and it was getting harder for her balance to stay intact while she greeted as many fans as she could. But tonight's show was different simply because her dressing room was a trailer and she was at a fair. Her set started at seven and ended at nine and then she would have three hours to ride the rides. But she couldn't ride the rides because she was pregnant and that annoyed her. What annoyed her the most was that she didn't get to experience the fair with Kaci. Kaci had been out and about with Karen all day while Stevie stewed in the trailer. 

After her set, she was walking off and back to her trailer when Kaci grabbed her hand. How her child was still awake she didn't know, but she didn't question it because it was her fault. Kaci's sleep schedule was so messed up because she was touring with her mother and Stevie felt bad. 

"What?" Stevie asks.

"Momma, can I do a few more rides?" She asks. 

"Well, I don't see why not. But let me put some jeans on and I'll come with you okay." Stevie pulls her into a hug. 

She felt weird wearing a pair of jeans and a black teeshirt paired with one of Lindsey's white and black flannel shirts but she was having fun watching her daughter ride the rides. She was on the apple spinner ride with Sharon, and another little girl, her back up singer was sitting between the two girls.  Stevie was smiling watching her little girl giggling as her baby girl was kicking inside of her and she wished that Lindsey was there to experience it with her.  

She had security around her, but when she made eye contact with a young almost teenage girl she smiled and the girl looked down in embarrassment. But the fact she was also holding a sleeping toddler piqued Stevie's interest so, she slowly made her way towards her and the girl looked up at her. 

"I'm sorry, it's just...It took a lot to get here tonight and I'm a huge fan and your set was amazing. And my daughter she's four I had her when I was sixteen, she wanted to go on this ride and since I kind of made her go to your concert I told her she could ride it but my son. He's one,  is sleeping so even if I could've held him in my arms he still wouldn't be tall enough but Sharon agreed. I didn't think she had any kids." 

"She doesn't that's my daughter. I would've gotten on, but I'm pregnant. And I'm so glad that you enjoyed the concert." Stevie smiles.

"Really, that's your..." The girl starts but is cut off by Kaci running to Stevie. 

"Momma, this is Amber, can we go get elephant ears?" Kaci asks as Stevie squats and takes her into her arms. 

"Well, if it's okay with Amber's mom I don't see why not. Did you like that ride?" Stevie asks.

"Yeah, I've ridden it like ten times." Kaci grins. 

"Oh did you, while mom was working?" Stevie asks.

"Yeah while you were working. So Elephant ear?" 

"Well ask Amber's mom?" Stevie points to the woman she had been talking too. 

"Um, would it be okay if we get Elephant ears?" Kaci looks up at the woman.

"Oh, I don't think we..." She starts.

"I'll pay for it. And you won't be intruding." Stevie groans out as she stands up. Middle age and pregnancy don't go well together.

"Will you pay for mine too?" Sharon asks.

"Just because I like you." Stevie points as they head to the elephant ear stand. 

After three cinnamon sugar, deep-fried doughs had been ordered and three lemonades and two raspberry slushies later they were sitting at a bench, and Amber and Kaci were getting along really well.

"My daddy is a soldier so he's not here right now...what does your daddy do?" Amber asks.

"My daddy is a singer just like mommy. But he's at home he didn't come to work with me and mommy." Kaci explains.

"I'm going to be a singer like the lady we saw tonight she was really good." Amber smiles. 

"Amber, honey this is the lady that we saw tonight?" Jodie, the young woman, points to Stevie.

"Really, you look different. But you were really good." Amber grins.

"Thank you, but I look different because I'm not wearing my uniform right now. Just like how your dad wears a uniform to work, I wear a uniform to work too." Stevie explains. 

***

They eventually leave when the fair closes and Kaci fell asleep on the way home. As Stevie was carrying her in the elevator, Karen turned to her.

"Something's wrong." 

"I wish Lindsey was here. He should've been the one that rode the rides with her today. Not you are Sharon, though I thank you for doing that. She had so much fun and it means the whole world to me when she's happy." Stevie smiles. 

"It was nothing. I always loved the fair as a kid and I got to relive it with her. She did get upset because I wouldn't let her play any of the games I just let her ride the rides." Karen shrugs.

"Well, that was good because they're a waste of money. And honestly, the last thing she needs is more stuffed animals." Stevie explains. 

"Have you spoken to Lindsey since you told him you needed to be apart from him?" 

"Briefly, I mostly talk to the kids and he mostly talks to Kaci. I still don't know where I'm going to go or what I'm going to do when this tour wraps next month." She sighs.

"Is there anywhere you could go, like stay with a friend or something? I'd let you stay with me but I live in a one-bedroom." Karen asks. 

"I mean, logistically no. But If I want to spend some money I could go stay with my parents in Scottsdale, but I don't know Karen...I miss my kids and it's going to suck if they come to the concert and then we go separate ways." She bites her lip.

"Well, you could buy a condo. I mean you'd have to talk it over with Lindsey but, give the extra key to William. Find one that's close to UCLA and he can crash there if he has late nights or something." Karen shrugs.

"You know that's a good idea. Can you find me a realtor tomorrow and get me in contact with them so we can work on that." Stevie questions when the doors open and she steps onto her floor. 

"Yeah of course. can you get the door or do you need me to help?" Karen asks motioning to the sleeping little girl. 

"I can manage. Thank you though." Stevie smiles digging with her free hand for the key. 

Stevie manages to get Kaci wrangled into her pajamas and into bed and once she's changed into her own pajamas she immediately falls asleep.