I'm Not Hopeless Just Helpless

Chapter #17

Louis' Point of View

I sighed contently when Harry's breathing evened out, though the way he freaked out about his voice has me concerned. I will have to make sure Dr. Hunter explains clearly, so nothing gets lost in translation. I never want Harry to think poorly of himself, that's not me Harry. I bury me noise in his hair and breath in scent. God! He smells like home. I never want to forget his musk. I really want to play with his hair, but he has the hand I need to do so, instead I settle for drawing patterns on his almost blank right arm. Tracing the words 'Things I can'. I must admit it's not my favourite of his tattoos but I'm pretty sure he could say the same about a few of mine, though I can't help but wonder why he didn't get it covered up at the same time he got the 'Holly Bible' tat. I've asked him multiple times, but he only ever answer back with "It's not time yet Lou. It doesn't feel right to cover that one. I don't think I will ever get that one covered but who knows?" I never understood his obsession with faith and fate. Liam came over to me at this moment kicking me out of me thoughts.

"You alright mate?"

"Yeah Li I'm fine."

"You know it's okay not to be okay right?"

"God, you and Harry talk some shit sometimes. Yes, I'm perfectly aware that's it's okay not to be 'okay' but Liam; he woke up and the first thing he did was make everyone laugh. I can't lose this boy. Shit Liam I'm so gone for him."

"One would hope so since you're married to him."

"Shut up. I was going all mature then."

"I know and it's scary. Maturity doesn't suit you at all."

"You're a shithead you know." Liam laughed and patted me head

"So, you keep telling me." Zayn and Niall laughed when I flipped Liam off which was a bit awkward because of the angle me right hand was but I still succeeded and for some reason this led us to play 'Never Have I Ever'. I think it's because we've been playing a lot in some interviews recently. Anyway, when it was starting to get really juicy Dr. Hunter walked in. Dr. Hunter took one look at me and stated.

"For some reason I thought Mr. Styles would have been the big spoon." Everyone howled at this.

"Everyone says that." Niall stated in during his laughing fit, "It's because he is the taller one out of all of us, but he is too submissive to be the big spoon. Big arse softy our Harold."

"But I get Louis being the big spoon." the doc said suddenly causing everyone to blink.

"How come?" Zayn asked.

"The protectiveness nature and the sass the pours out of him leaves no other option." I chuckled at that along with Zayn while Niall and Liam just blinked.

"How do you possibly know about his protective side? No-one outside us and our families know about that that side." Niall questioned

"I knew the moment he said, and I quote "That young lad happens to be my fucking husband mate. I would bloody know if he was taking fucking drugs. Bloody hell we're legit stuck together with these three twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week! I think someone would have noticed if Harry was high as a fucking kite!" All the boys shook their heads.

"You really need to learn how to hold your tongue sometimes Louis. It's going to get you into trouble."

"Belt up Liam. This is the way I am and if you don't like it you can leave the band." I warned in return. Everyone except Dr. Hunter laughed.

"That was a bit harsh." That statement caused the lads to laugh harder.

"He's said worse." Zayn shrugged.

"Honestly though how has Mr. Styles stayed married to you?" this one question sparked a domino effect making everyone go quiet because whilst everyone has been laughing Harry woke up and the daggers he was sending to Dr. Hunter was literally death. "What did I say?"

"We had a fight a couple of years ago. While he was living with me. Mentally he was already at the door. I whispered carding my hands through Harry's hair.

"Them!" Harry choked out quietly. It was so quiet that I was amazed that Dr. Hunter heard him.

"What happened?" Unfortunately, before I could answer devil in question appeared and Harry went rigid.

"Hey boys."

"Hello Darcy." echoed around the room. The doctor raised his eyebrow at the 5-foot 7" pitch black hair that was in a ponytail, woman dressed in a business suite. Liam managed to tell Dr. Hunter that this woman was from their management team and prepare to watch me kick off.

"How did...?" I trailed off gripping Harry's hand tighter as I felt him try to pull away. I looked at his face, his eyes were closed like he could fool everyone into thinking that he went back to sleep. I knew he wasn't the case, which led me to gently pull him closer to me chest. I am not letting this boy go anytime soon and I told him as much as I placed a kiss on his hairline.

"We always know where you are Mr. Tomlinson." I glared at her as she shooed Niall out of his seat "Right boys, what the hell is going on? This isn't a standard asthma attack. You have five seconds to explain yourselves and why you missed two interviews... Go." nobody said anything "Alright since no-one wants to speak this is how it's going to work. In five minutes, you Mr. Tomlinson are going to wake Mr. Styles up, while you're doing that, Mr. Horan and Mr. Malik clean up the mess you've created, Mr. Payne is going to lead Mr. Styles to the car where it will then take all of you to the next venue then we will proceed with the tour." Darcy ordered.

"Harry can't leave the hospital yet!" I growled "He had major surgery to glue his fucking sternum back together and he was in a coma for three fucking days plus he can't even talk right now due to the fact that had to intubate him."

"You let them shove a tube down Mr. Styles' throat?!" she screeched making Harry flinch, I started to play with his hair as that is always a quick way to get him to relax and I know if I do it for long enough he will eventually fall asleep and right now that is exactly what I'm hoping for.

"No, we couldn't get a tube down his throat due to his airwaves being too blocked. We had to make an incision under his vocal box instead and insert the ventilator that way along with corticosteroids to treat the asthma attack." Dr. Hunter explained which didn't actually help me position at all in fact it just made it two-hundred times worse.

"You let them cut him open?!"

"To save his life!" I stated calmly feeling Harry's breathing slowly even out.