Taylor's POV
The first couple of days without Karlie were difficult, more for me than Grayson. I never realised until now just much he's grown accustomed to Karlie being gone, so I know that letting Gray sleep in our room was more for my benefit than his. I took the Wednesday off so that we could take Karlie to the airport, but from Thursday it was back to life as normal. We speak to Kar every night at bedtime and I send her emails every day, but it has been one of the hardest weeks of my life.
"Hurry, Gray, we gotta go," I call out to the little boy as I gather my keys and phone, throwing them in my purse, "where are we going?" He frowns as he runs out into the hallway and I smile as I kneel to fasten his coat, "I'm going to drop you off with Auntie Jourd so that you can hang out with Riley while I run some errands and then you guys are going to meet Auntie Abbie and I at the mall, remember?" Abbie has a doctor's appointment this afternoon and we didn't think it would be much fun for Gray, so Jourdan offered to keep him for a little while.
"Can I play on the jungle gym?" His face lights up and I laugh as I wink, "that's the plan, buddy." Karlie and I finished his Christmas shopping before she left, but I still have to shop for others and we agreed that it would do us all some good to stay distracted and busy while our partners are gone. "Up you go," I lift Grayson up into my SUV and help him buckle up. "Does dino have a name yet?" I raise an eyebrow as I hand him the stuffed toy from my bag and he nods, grinning as he turns it's head towards me, "his name is Tommy."
My heart feels like it's going to stop for a moment but I force a smile onto my face as I ruffle Gray's hair, "that's adorable, buddy." I close his door and I take a deep breath, it's just a name... his name holds no power over me, I know I'm safe now. I knew that Karlie leaving would raise my anxiety but I need to stay calm and focus for Grayson. He needs to me to be rational and I know Tom has no clue where I am, that was my top priority.
We drive over to Jourdan's first and after a a five minute example from Riley of his new racecar, I tell Gray to be good and kiss him goodbye. From there I head over to Abbie's to pick up my best friend. We agreed that until Karlie and Matt come home, we're going to go to each other's appointments, that way neither of us are doing this alone.
"Hey, how are you feeling?" I give the redhead a warm smile as she gets into the passengers seat, "I don't wanna jinx it but today is the first day I've made it through without morning sickness, so I'm doing alright." Abbie laughs as she looks over to me, she's a couple of weeks further along than me so I can only hope I get the same luxury soon. "Have you heard from Matt?" I smile as I pull out of her driveway and she nods, "I spoke to him last night, I promised to send him an update him later on today."
I nod as I reach for her hand, "one week down, twenty three left to go," the redhead laughs as she nods, squeezing my hand tight, "how are you coping? The first deployment is always the hardest." Matt has been in the army since he was old enough to join and Abbie has been dealing with this since they met at eighteen, "I'm just trying to keep things normal and try not to worry about the fact that the first person to truly love me in nearly twenty five years is in the middle of a warzone and if something goes wrong then I might be alone with three kids to raise."
I laugh at my own fears as I try not to let the it over power me and Abbie frowns as she shakes her head, "Karlie is going to be fine. She's very good at her job, and even if something does happen then you will never be alone. You're part of a community now, Teff, and we'll take care of you and the kids." I sigh as I nod, giving my best friend a soft smile. I don't even want to entertain the possibility of losing Karlie, but I know it's an all too real threat for the next few months.
"Have you decided if you're going to find out the gender of the twins yet?" She changes the subject and I'm grateful. "Kar is anxious to know, she doesn't want Gray to feel replaced so I think she wants them to be girls, but I really don't care as long as they're born healthy. Although, I think Gray would be so sweet with little sisters." I understand Karlie's fear, but even if one or both of the babies is a boy then Grayson will still be my little guy.
