The Adventures of My Creative Writing Class

We are Darkness

Darkness.
Before the world was made there was only darkness. After the world is destroyed there will be only darkness.
Darkness.
It is both our beginning and end. It even lurks in the middle: every time the sun goes down and there is no promise of tomorrow, the voices in our heads telling us that we aren't good enough, pain, hate, envy, betrayal. We can't escape darkness, it comes when we least expect it and swallows us whole, emptying us out until there is nothing left but darkness. We are darkness.
"I am become death. Destroyer of worlds." -Oppenheimer 

I think I'm drowning- no, I am drowning. I know I'm drowning because I can't breathe, I can't see, or feel.
I'm falling. I think I'm screaming but I can't hear anything. 
I think my heart is racing. I know it's racing because I'm scared- no, terrified. 
Where am I?
Who am I?
What's happening?
Why can't I wake up?
At last the black abyss withdraws its talons. 
My eyes are closed but light seeps through anyway.
I'm suddenly aware of my body. I lay flat on my back. There are sounds, sounds I don't recognize. I try to look around but my eyes are glued shut. 
Why can't I move?
I hear voices, voices of people I don't know. A cocktail of voices. One is rough, one is shrill, one is song like, there is another one which is barely audible.
I'm being rolled. They are sticking things onto my skin, they are pricking me with things I can only guess are needles. 
Electricity courses through my limbs all at once. I feel as if they are throwing me out of my body. Jolting and shocking and shaking and I can't- I can't hold on.
I want to yell. I want to beg them to stop but I have no semblance of words and my tongue is too dry and my mouth will not open and my throat- my throat- I'm choking on nothing.
Silence. Then sobbing. I try to imagine who- I try to imagine- there is only darkness. It has caught me again and I'm falling once more.
Where am I?
Who am I? 
What's happening?
…
Why me?
My chest is open, the cavity exposed. My guts are spilling out. Everything I ever was is gone and I am left empty, as if my life was a dream and once awake it was forgotten. But I'm not awake- no I am awake. And I think that I have gone insane because I can't remember a thing and I am lost.
I am lost.
I am lost.
I want to cry but it has taken away my tears and I feel so empty.
Maybe I'm floating, maybe I'm not. I have nothing but my thoughts and they aren't making sense because I am empty. 
Am I dying?
No, I can't be because I never lived. I would surely remember if I did. It takes seven minutes to go brain dead.
Why do I know that?
I would see a flash of my life. I would see who I am- was. I would feel happiness for one last time. I would see my goals and dreams and everything in between. I would see who I loved and who loved me. It would feel real.
But I'm empty. And lost. So lost.
Someone help me, please.
I have fallen into darkness and I can't crawl to the surface because I am so weak, I am so empty. 
I want to fight. I want to get out. I want to live. I want to feel.
Let me fight. Let me get out. Let me live. Let me feel.
Please.
Do I believe in God?
Why would I ask this question?
Then why isn't he here?
Because there is only darkness. I am empty and I am darkness and there is nothing else.
Nothing.
We build and we destroy. We love and we hate. We aren't beautiful. We aren't ugly. It doesn't matter who we were or what we did. In the end there is only darkness. 
Convey what you want, darkness is coming.
We are darkness.

Xoxo KKHughz