You Got Yr. Cherry Bomb [ruby da cherry]

The Taste Of Ink

     The show ended up being great. I started appreciating performing more, as it was the only thing I could do without being bombarded with thoughts. For the first time ever, performing was enjoyable the whole way through. Beginning, middle, end. It was so nice to be able to focus on something other than the thoughts that made me feel like shit. I was completely in the moment, and I loved every second of it.

     Until, of course, my set ended and I walked offstage to see Ruby waiting for me with a big smile on his face. So cute. Wait, fuck, no!

     He pulled me in for a hug. "That was the best I ever seen you perform," he genuinely sounded proud.

     "Really?" I pulled away a bit and looked up at him. He gave an excited nod before tightening the hug again. He then let go of me and put his hand on my shoulder. Old man, what are you doing to me?

     "It's not like you're bad or anythin' usually, but tonight you seemed so.. present. Like you had no anxiety at all."

     "Well, I had a lot less anxiety than before, if that's what you mean."

     "Whatever the reason, keep it up. Unless it's drugs, then don't."

     "Noted," I awkwardly gave a thumbs up and Ruby walked away. The other guys also came up to compliment my performance, but I could not for the life of me get Ruby's hug out of my head.

     After the boys performed and everything was over, I plopped myself down on the couch in the bus. My legs and back were killing me. Scott offered to drive the bus, and the next day would be another no show day. Unfortunately, though, we had to stay in the bus since we didn't have a hotel for our off day.

     I laid my head back and stared at the ceiling. The guys were all getting ready to do whatever they needed to do before we pulled out of the venue. The show was over, the fan interactions were over, and my thoughts were able to rush back into my brain full swing. I wanted to get up and take off my makeup, change, etc., but my muscles hurt too much.

     "You aight?" Scott sat next to me. I turned my head to face him and half smiled.

     "Just sore," I replied.

     "Come on now. You look lost in thought."

     "Eh, my brain's a fuckin' mess. I'm not super used to touring yet so I guess the constant change is messing with me."

     "I get it. But you got us, so anytime you're overwhelmed jus' talk to one of us. Maybe if I have enough down time tomorrow we'll go and do sum' to take your mind off things."

     "That sounds nice. What do you have planned tomorrow? We're off aren't we?"

     "Yeah, but there's sum' wrong wit' my phone. I don't have a clue what's wrong but it ain't workin' right."

     "Maybe you need to upgrade."

     "Heh. 'Course you'd say that, Miss 'I get a new phone every year.'"

     "Hey, not fair. I got a new phone before tour so that I didn't have to spend a day I had off trying to figure out what's wrong with it."

     "Well, guess you're smarter than me in that sense. I gotta get drivin' before them apes over there get fussy," Scott got up and pat me on the shoulder once before disappearing into the driver's area.

     Kevin came over and sat in the booth seat nearest the couch. "Did he just call us apes?"

     "Possibly," I picked my head up. Kevin put on an exaggerated pout before getting up and flinging whatever he was holding at the driver's seat.