Waiting for the Sun

1. Carry You Away Over the Moors

The light was yellow and the naked walls looked even worse than usual in the night. He was fast asleep next to me, hooked up to machines that still looked alien to me and I didn't know what half of them actually did. All I wanted was to carry him out of here and never look back. Maybe he would make it.
A muffled cry came over his lips which I knew by now meant he was dreaming. I wondered what he could be imagining in there where there were no obstacles, only opportunities. Maybe he was running again. That thought made me smile and once again I buried my face in Wuthering Heights. The romance, the tragedy, could it get any better than this? Real life was so boring and predictable. Why couldn't my dad bring a gipsy boy home that I could fall madly in love with and eventually die for?

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The scream escaping his lips cut through the silence and my book fell to the floor. I had probably dozed off but now if felt like I had been awake for hours. Not knowing what to say I grabbed his hand but he kept on screaming like he was possessed. His dreams were obviously not filled with opportunities, only the horror dragging on from his bleak reality.

"I'm here, I'm here", I kept repeating but he didn't even seem to notice I was there.

I pressed my hands against my face and tried to breath deep. Calm breaths, it isn't so hard. Why wouldn't he stop screaming?

"Why didn't you call?"

The words made me jump and my hands quickly came down to my sides again. The night nurse nobody liked didn't wait for me to answer. She simply walked up to one of the machines, pressed some buttons and a few seconds later he was asleep again. The nurse left us and I sat back down in my chair. I took a few ragged breaths and scratched my itchy eyebrows. When I was calm enough, I started to read the book's familiar lines out loud. Maybe now moors and wild Yorkshire would seep into his dreams and slowly light them up while his reality would become the fiction.