𝚜𝚑𝚒𝚟𝚎𝚛 | 𝖼.𝗌 𝗑 𝗌.𝗆 𝗑 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋

𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚏𝚒𝚏𝚝𝚎𝚎𝚗

warning: themes alluding to a sexual nature

8am

"look, just don't come in today" hongjoong had told him down the phone after he had called to ask how y/n was. san had told him that he'd stayed up half the night waiting for her to stop throwing up. and he was too scared to fall asleep in case something happened to her.

"just look after her"

"I will. thank you, joong"

"san?" a call came from upstairs.

"I gotta go, joong, she just woke up"

"I'll call you later"

san hung up the call and hurried upstairs to y/n who was sat up in bed, rubbing her head.

"good morning" he smiled, "how are you feeling?"

"my head hurts" she pouted. in all honesty, san wouldn't have been surprised if she'd still have been drunk, the amount she had last night.

"I'll get you something" he offered.

"no, don't bother, I deserve it"

san got back into bed next to her and pulled her close to him before asking, "why did you do it, y/n?"

she settled on his shoulder before replying. "because I hate my life"

"but what triggered it?" san pressed.

"yunho called and... begged me to reconsider... and then mingi... messaged me"

"what did he say?" san immediately felt the anger rising in him at the mention of mingi's name.

"that he loved me... and other stuff"

san didn't know how to reply. he wanted to ask her if she still loved him too, but he couldn't.

"san? did you call me 'baby' last night?" she changed the subject.

he hesitated. she had clearly remembered.

"you can carry on... if you like" she continued without waiting for an answer.

san let a small smile appear on his face, "okay... baby" he laughed.

she tried to laugh too but it was too painful: she heavily regretted her choices last night.

"you're not at work today?" she asked, ignoring her throbbing head.

"no, I want to be with you"

"I told you not to, san" she scolded.

"joong said it was okay. don't worry. we can just stay in bed all day if you like"

it was very tempting, she thought.

-----

so, san had made them both breakfast and brought it upstairs to y/n on a tray. he didn't want her to have to move when she felt so lousy.

y/n felt like she had no idea what she'd done to deserve this. she didn't remember much of last night but she knew she couldn't have been much fun to deal with.

as the day went on and they'd finished watching their third movie of the day, she started to feel increasingly better and even a little more positive. maybe everything really was going to be okay. san had told her so, and even though so much bad had happened, she truly believed him when he said it.

"how are you feeling now?" san asked with a yawn as the credits rolled on the screen.

"better.. I think I'm feeling better" she answered, not lying for once.

san had a huge beam on his face as he turned to face her, he was so glad to hear her say that. so glad, that he plucked up all his courage and pulled her close to him as he pressed a passionate kiss on to her lips. as he continued with the kiss, he felt a warm sensation build inside, like this time, he wanted it to be more than just a twenty second kiss.

he pulled her closer to him beneath the bed sheets and sat up to get a better look at the girl he'd been dreaming about for the last two years.

y/n's eyes were filled with lust and invited him to proceed with whatever he had in mind. but he couldn't just jump into it.

he pulled away from the kiss and moved his mouth to her ear, whispering, "do you want me to stop?"

"no" she breathed as she moved her hand to under his shirt to feel his toned body beneath her fingers. san fell to pieces under her touch and quickly moved himself to be on top of her.

"tell me if you want me to stop" he spoke softly, but his tone also mingled with intense desire.

"I don't want you to stop" she told him, arching her back to be close to san's warm body.

they both felt the heat become more intense in the room as san broke away from the kiss to remove his shirt. y/n breathed deeply as she saw his body finally revealed to her and went to remove her shorts, but was interrupted by san working his mouth down her neck. she moaned and shifted beneath him, wanting to be even closer to him.

"is it okay if I remove your shirt?" he asked, perfectly polite on the outside but inside he was being ravaged by lust.

she pulled it off in response and threw it to the floor, leaving san almost breathless.

"...wow" was all he said before he returned to peppering lustful kisses on her neck and down her chest.

she moaned louder against his touch and reached for the waistband of his sweatpants.

"I want you" she whispered.

san peered up to look her in the eyes as he spoke, "I want you too, y/n. more than anything. but i don't know if we should, you might still be a little intoxicated - and you weren't feeling well"

"I'm not drunk, sannie, and I feel fine" she whined.

"it wouldn't be right of me-" he protested, but was interrupted by y/n pulling him on top of her again and thrusting her hips up to feel his hardness. "are you sure?" she teased.

he let out a small purr as he tried to control himself, "be serious, baby. I don't want to take advantage of you"

she stopped and sat up to be level with him, looking him in his eyes.

"san, I love you. and I want you to make me yours"

his mouth fell open as his gaze never shifted. "you... love me?" he asked.

"yes. I love you" she smiled. "and I know you love me"

"how did you know?" he queried.

"you're not very good at keeping it a secret" she laughed.

"I love you more than anything. I always have" he shrugged, a shy smile on his face.

"then please - show me"