Until We Lose Ourselves

24

Eden pulled him into a tight hug. "I don't think she really knew what she had. She wouldn't have let you go just like that, if she did."

"Or maybe it had to happen so I would become less of an asshole." He laughed.

"You are still young, Jonah. You deserve to spend this time having fun. And after the incident with your parents, now you can't go out because of me..."

"It isn't your fault."

"Somewhat is, don't even deny it."

"It's my home too. Don't make me feel like an outsider. At least you don't have to be alone."

"Even if it means that the others are here despite not wanting to?" Eden laughed.

"Well, they can't change it now." Jonah laughed with her.

They broke away from the hug and Eden sat back down.

"I don't know what happened to my parents. One moment they were there, the next they weren't." Eden watched him.

He watched her too. "How is that possible?"

"I don't know. It happened when I was overdosing on drugs, I don't remember much either. But, I came over to the house one day, and they were gone. Calling, texting, no response."

Jonah's eyebrows furrowed. "I don't get it. How can they just disappear? There must've been evidence, or some note, or something."

"There wasn't. No one knew what happened to them either. Though, I'm half-convinced they didn't want anything to do with me, and so they left."

"Why do you think that? They were your family..."

"I wasn't necessarily a good daughter, even other than with the drugs..." Eden bit her lip.

"I doubt that anyone would leave their child just because of problems they were having. You were going through a hard time, doesn't mean that they just gave up on you. There must be some other thing going on, I don't know, but I refuse to think they would have done that." Jonah ranted.

"Maybe you're right, maybe not. Fact is, I don't know where they are anymore. Let's just leave it at that." Eden said.

Jonah went quiet. "You stopped me from overdosing so that I wouldn't..."

"Have to go through the struggle of getting addicted and going through a withdrawal, or possibly dying? Yeah." Eden looked down at her hands.

"You're much more than what you show everyone, Paris." He intertwined their fingers together, of the hands they held. "There's actually a whole other world inside of you, that you hide well."

"Trust me, Jonah. It's hidden for a good reason." Eden stared into his eyes.

In the next moment, their eyes closed and they leaned in. Their lips met.

Once they pulled away, Eden whispered, "I know you think a lot. I know it's hard for you to pull yourself to sleep. I can't promise that I'll always be there, but if you ever feel like you're drowning... call me. I won't let you."

Jonah pulled her down on the bed beside him. Eden brushed a hand through his hair. He watched her closely, taking in every detail. Her hand in his hair was the most sense of comfort he had experienced during those times. He was falling for her. He knew it.

He wondered if he'd fall before he would drown. He wasn't in a hurry to find out. He wanted that moment to last forever. With her by his side.

But alas, he didn't know the actual storm she was, and she feared he wouldn't look at her the same way again, if he did discover.

.

Late night conversations became common, and it was almost a daily occurrence that Eden would fall asleep in Jonah's bed. Jonah's feelings grew, but Eden didn't have the space for those emotions. The nights she didn't come, she would be overwhelmed and trying to calm herself in her room. Jonah was struggling too, but it didn't show. Nights they spent apart, they spent awake, almost always.

That day was one she didn't come. After a cold shower, he wore the first thing he could find, and collapsed on his bed. Often times, he didn't feel like changing the temperature of the water. It was almost... pointless. Yet, every night he spent with her, seemed to hold meaning.

With everything on his mind, he picked up his notepad and pen. He began to write. Lyrics, they always flowed to him easily, even when his mind felt heavy.

He noticed how dependant he was becoming. How he couldn't sleep unless he had talked to her.

Eden, in her room, cried. She didn't know what she was crying for, but she was crying. It felt like the right thing to do. Maybe it was the fact, that her head was pounding. Maybe the fact that it was the anniversary of the day her family had left her, no warning, no note, just gone. Maybe the fact that they had yet again been denied from leaving to go see Millie, who still remained on her hospital bed. Maybe the fact that she felt so alone, more than other nights, and how she knew, that loneliness only made her worse for if anyone came near her.

3 am rolled around, and there was a scream of terror from the ground floor. Eden wiped her face roughly, before leaving her room and racing downstairs. Everyone had come out. Lili was the one who had screamed. She was being consoled by Liam.

Once there, everyone was confused as to what had happened. Liam was the one to explain. "We were watching a movie, and she heard something. She went to check, and called me. I got up, and there was suddenly a large pounding noise from the basement door. She screamed and I rushed over. We don't know what happened."

The guards had come inside and heard the story. They pulled out their guns and moved downstairs slowly.

Eden's headache only seemed to worsen. She squeezed her eyes shut, before opening them. Jonah reached out for her hand, but she pulled away, turning her back towards everyone and walking away.

The guards busted open the door, and there were signs of a break in. The windows that touched the ceiling were smashed. Things had fallen over, but there was no one there.

"He got away again." Eden heard.

"What can you even do? Why are you even still here? Go away! You can't help us with anything!" Emilia yelled at the guard.

"Stay calm-"

"Shut up!" Liam yelled. "Take this seriously, and move your asses, or leave." He was not happy.