Chapter 3

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To anyone looking, Sarah appeared as a heartbroken woman who was mourning the death of the love of her life. Her misery matched that which society expected a woman who was almost married, to carry for sometime. Together with the heavy black clothes society imposes on every woman who's husband dies. That's what society does, it literally thrusts every widow into a small cold room, with a book full of rules, and expect her to rid herself of all the bad luck that accompanies death, until they deem her clean enough to go back into civilization.

Sarah was living in her guilt, a room she built securely for the past few days. She didn't love Vincent, if anything she used to feel the opposite for him. Vincent was imposed on her, like a responsibility that she wasn't ready for, yet couldn't run away from. A year ago, Sarah was ready and almost happy to be hung on the spinster wall together with the few woman who just didn't care about marriage, hell she couldn't be less bothered. This was until a letter, from a father that wasn't much of a father to her, found it's way inside the Day's household in the bundle of their normal mail.

Initially she laughed hysterically at the contents of the letter. There was no way a man that has never made an effort to be in her life would feel entitled to what he was requesting of her. Grandma Tutu, like always, had a bottle of something in her hands, chugging like someone was racing with her.

"He wants what?!" The old woman's voice rose to lengths that a woman of her age should never reach, which seemed to further tickle Sarah's ribs. After her little laughing session she read the letter out loud. "My darling Sarah, I know I have not been the best father to you but I made a promise to someone very influential. This promise will guarantee that all your siblings will be well taken care of when I die.

"I promised Joseph Wilson that you will marry his eldest son in exchange for my family's safety and well-being, it seemed like a good idea then, I thought I could get out of it before I die. I know I am in no position to ask anything from you but I am a dying man. I know you wouldn't let your siblings suffer because of my mistakes,

Love,
Your dying father"

Rage blanketed her as she thought back to how easily she succumbed to the emotional blackmail painted on that letter. It ate at her for months, taking a piece of the loathe she bore for her useless father daily till her resolution broke. After rage came guilt, she convinced herself that she would not be doing it for a man who was as useless alive as he is dead, she would be doing it for his kids, her siblings! So Sarah agreed to marry Vincent Wilson. A pompous, self-absorbed and good-looking young man of 30 years.

He spoke more than he listened with the uncanny skill of turning every conversation to be about him and his handsome face or his expensive taste or the long queue of ladies dying to date him. Sarah still wonders how she managed to survive 4 months listening to him go on about his average good looks. If she got a bottle of alcohol each time he mentioned his beauty, she would be Grandma Tutu's favourite grandchild. Vincent was also very open to her about his dealings with other women, while they were together. Sometimes she felt like he flaunted it in her face because he knew she hardly got hit on.

After they met, he made it clear that she was pretty but not his type of pretty and that had been okay with Sarah because he was definitely not her type as well. Sarah did not like Vincent, he felt like a burden to her. He was the cause of her vile mother's return, a week after their engagement hit the public, Talya appeared out of nowhere. What annoyed Sarah more was how her mother doted on Vincent, she treated him more like her child than she ever would treat her. They went on 'mother-in-law and son-in-law' dates and sent each other gifts like they had known each other for years. This fueled Sarah's anger!

Grandma Tutu was the petrol and she was a raging ball of fire. The former strongly disliked Vincent, she called him a 'stupid theatrical asswipe'! So whenever Sarah complained about him, Grandma Tutu would fuel the fire. The old woman would pull all sorts of tricks when Vincent came over, from accidentally pouring wine on his expensive clothes to accidentally setting him on fire! At the end of the day, the old woman and her granddaughter would laugh about it over a bottle or two, of wine. Sarah was an emotional mess but not because a loved one had just passed on. She was an emotional wreck because she was drowning in guilt, dark and terribly ugly guilt!
_

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