After the rebellion | Part 1

Chapter 1

-Katniss
I moved back to district 12 today, just me and Haymitch. Peeta didn't move back, I don't think he ever will.

It would be a miracle to see him walk the land of district 12 again. It would be a miracle to walk the land of district 12 with him.I've lost everyone; Prim, my mother, Gale, Finnick and Peeta, of course Peeta.

We've been through so much together and as individuals I just thought we might need each other. I do need him. But I guess he doesn't want that, he wants to be alone and I understand that. But what if I miss him? What am I going to do without him? No, I will miss him. I don't know what I'll do without him.

Let's not get caught up in the fact I can't live without Peeta and get back to the fact I still have Haymitch. It isn't the same, but it will have to do.My old, drunken mentor Haymitch. He's done so much for me, and of course Peeta.

No matter what I think about, Peeta always comes back into my mind. It must mean something. It can't be normal to think about someone so much and all the time.

I guess I'll just go to my house and sit in bed all day waiting for something exciting to happen, as if that will happen. It's district 12, nothing exciting ever happens here.I walk up the front steps to my house and walk through the door.

I scan my eyes over the front room to see it is absolutely filthy. I sigh to myself. I guess it's something to keep me occupied for a day, maybe two.I kick past the mess and walk over to the cabinet by the stairs.

I open up the top drawer and place the pearl - the one Peeta gave me on the beach - into the draw along with my medallion into the top drawer before closing it shut tightly.

If he isn't coming back to 12 then I atleast need a drawer in my house that reminds me of him. But then again... I'll never forget Peeta.

I smile to myself and walk up the stairs to my bedroom, or what used to be my bedroom. I push everything off the bed before climbing into the - God knows how long - dirty sheets and into a nightmare filled sleep.

I wake up every half an hour screaming her name "Prim!" A few times I even woke up screaming "Peeta!". But mostly Prim... How could I let her go? I miss my little duck, I wish she'd come back to me. I couldn't protect her. I can't forgive myself for it, I never will. I miss my boy with the bread.