He looks up and feels ashamed he got caught. He couldn't believe it. his mum walked in and just stood there and watched him cut until he had noticed to look up and take a breath. he was so embarrassed, he wanted to die. They step out of the car and walk up the the white blocked shaped building. MARY-BELL INSTITUTE. He was nervous and his hands were shaking when he finished reading the sign.
"Miss Irwin?" The women got up and walked to the front where a big lady handed a clipboard to his mum. After she signed her name, Ashton had to sign his or else.. well he didn't want to find out. His mom gave him a quick hug and kiss on the check then left without even saying she loved him. He grabbed his bags and walked toward a man near the door to the hall. He smiled at the boy but he didn't look up, just looked straight ahead.
"If you need anything, just go down the hall and take a left then knock on the glass so someone can help." Mr. Grain said, the man who walked the boy to his room. The boy nodded and stood still till the door closed.
He hadn't noticed that he had a roommate. Probably because he hadn't look up yet, he just rubbed his thumb over his left wrist. over the marks on his skin. "Um, who are you?" A voice says from the back left of the room. Ashton jumped and drew in a sharp breath then put his hands up toward his face. "I'm not gonna hurt you, it's okay mate." Ashton slowly lowered his hands, calmed down a bit then looked up. He looked at the boy with a lip ring. Ashton blushes and blinks a few times. "Uh, hi. I'm A-Ashton." The curly haired boy said. "Hi Ashton. My name is.. um, Luke." Luke smiles nervously. Each boy wonders what's wrong with the other but doesn't ask, instead they just nod and continue what they were doing."You can put your cloths in there." Ashton looks over at Luke and sees he's pointing at a brown wooden dresser. He flops the suitcase on his bed and unzips it. After he finished stuffing them into his dresser, he feels the urge to cut. he pushes the feeling away, he can do that later. When he was packing he thought about how he was going to cut. That he just put some blades onto his thigh and taped them, easy.
After putting personal items, which weren't very many, he took his shoes off as well as socks. He stretches his toes out and yawned. He took off the sheet and pillow which reeked of hospital and put on his own. Better, but not by much. They were dark blue but had stains on them. mostly blood. From beatings and cutting. But, that didn't matter to him. Luke was sitting in bed and watching the boy with the curly hair. When someone knocked on the door and came in they instructed for Luke to help Ashton if he was lost or confused. Luke agreed."Come on its dinner time." Luke said while shaking Ashtons shoulder. He stirred then sat up. They walked down the hallway side by side. It took Luke ten minutes to get Ashton out of bed. Luke actually laughed because Ashton kept asking for five more minutes. When they entered the lunch room, Ashton looked around. Five round tables spread out in the room. it wasn't big, but it was decent. the windows had wire sheets to make sure no one could escape and a tv hung on the wall. Luke motioned for him to follow. Luke spotted a table which had another boy at it. An Asian looking boy. Luke sat down next to him and started to fill out a sheet, circling and writing. I sit at a side of a table then look down a what is in front of me. A menu. "Pst, Luke... What do I do?" Ashton tried to whisper but wasn't really good at it. "Just circle what you want to eat tomorrow then write down how much." He says with his eyes focused on the task. Ashton circled what he wanted and how much. They even had chicken tenders. Lets hope it doesn't taste like hospital food. After the paper and pen was taken away from them, there was a plate to take its place. Mashed potatoes, corn and meatloaf along with a milk and apple juice. He was just about to take a bite of mashed potatoes when the room had a different feel to it. he turned around and looked at the door which was now occupied. A lilac haired boy with a very small frame steps in and walks over to the table in the far corner on the opposite side of the room. Ashton asks Luke who he is. "oh. um, that, uh.. Michael. Michael Clifford." he says and avoids eye contact. "Why is he sitting alone and why are you acting weird?" Ashton asks while stabbing his corn with his fork. Luke doesn't say anything and Ashton waits. "He talks to himself.. He's just.. weird I guess." They drop the conversation and eat the rest of their food. Ashton steels glances at the Michael boy. "helloooo?" Ashton snaps out of it when the Asian boy snaps his fingers. "oh, uh yeah?" He asks. "I'm Calum. You already had the pleasure to meet Luke, and your Ashton right?" Ashton nods his head and looks toward the window. This has been a long day. Michael looked up from his tray, he wasn't planning on eating it. oh no. He didn't want to gain one pound. Not one. if anything he wanted to lose weight. He looks at the group of boys who were talking quietly. well, except one boy. he must be new, but yet again he could be wrong, he doesn't pay attention much. A nurse came over and tried to insist that he eat. Michael takes a bite of the salad and swallows. Every bite was torture for the lilac boy, he hated eating. Absolutely hated it.
After everyone finished eating, in came a lady with dark jeans and a red top. Chest fully covered of course, Calum couldn't get aroused even if he tried. he huffed and slumped in his chair. "Hello everyone! Time to begin, everyone form a circle!" She was perky and annoying but hey whatcha gonna do? The boys moved their chairs into a circle. from left to right it went; Lady, Michael, Calum, Luke, Ashton. Michael was daydreaming of a thin version of him (unaware he was already stick thin), Calum was thinking about... you don't wanna know. Luke was thinking about how much anxiety he was getting and Ashton was thinking of blades. Sharp, pointed blades. "How is everyone?" She asks. No one answers with their voice, they just shrug. "well okay. lets get started! Everyone will pick a paper strip out of my bucket, then you read it and answer it! simple!" She smiles brightly and tossed her blonde hair over her shoulder. Michael gets the bucket first. He runs his fingers through his hair and pulls out some hair. Stupid anorexia. He picks a random piece and reads it, "what it your favorite color?" He says with absolutely no tone in his voice, "green." he says simply. He moved the bucket over to Calum, who smiles at Michael. Calum does the same, "what is your favorite childhood memory?" He mumbles that it's stupid and Michael grins. Ashton blushes when Michael sees he's looking at him. "uh, when I was with my pets." They lady nods and looks at Luke. He takes it and puts his hand in, moving it around. "um, uh, who is your best friend?" Luke looks at the floor and twiddled his thumbs. "Calum and Linda." he says quickly and quietly then carefully passes it to Ashton, as if it were glass. He grabs one from the bottom and reads it. "What is your favorite movie?" Everyone thought the game was dumb but they went along with it. "The Fault in our Stars." The boys giggled.
When they were done, they all walked back to their rooms. Luke and Ashton. Calum and Michael. They all fell asleep soon, each thinking of something different. Luke about how nervous he gets. Calum about boobs. Ashton got out if bed quickly and snuck into the bathroom he took his blades off his thighs and cut a line along his lower stomach, while Michael was weighing himself and throwing up the salad that he actually ate. Ashton couldn't sleep for a while but then fell into the land of nightmares. His dad haunted his dreams. Michael never falls asleep before Calum. he thought he was uglier when he slept and didn't want people to see. but soon enough too, Michael fell into a dreamless sleep.
YOU ARE READING
Midnight~5sos
FanfictionFan fiction Ashton Irwin, Michael Clifford, Calum Hood, Luke Hemmings Michael Clifford- 17, green eyes, lilac hair, 6'3, schizophrenic, anorexic Ashton Irwin- 18, hazel eyes, sandy hair, 6'0, self harm, abused Calum Hood- 16, brown eyes, brown hair...