Change my Heart, Change my World, Change me

Chapter 18: Kii's Interlude ~My Prince~

It's every girl dreams to have a Prince Charming swift them off the earth. It was my dream too. When I feel lonely I dream of him rescuing me and take me away for adventures. I want to leave this place. The Place that make me suffocated. I want to go away to the place where nobody know me.  I want to be free. I want to leave them. They won't miss me anyway.

When I was young mother tell me that I'm not her daughter. She said I was a daughter of a woman that force her husband to share his love. She told me that my mother is the reason Nee-sama is born. If not because of father marrying my mother she wouldn't have became an unfaithful woman and had Nee-sama with another man.

It was my mother fault, she said. Mother apologized that she wouldn't be able to love me. Aoi-nii she might able to love because he looks exactly like father but I was a carbon copy of our mother. It wasn't my fault, she said. But she just can't love me. 

She said that they only have one daughter and that was Nee-sama so I better be out of their way. I have no place in this family. That is what she told me years ago. 

She was right. I had no place.

No one love me, no one praise me when I did good. No one wish me Happy Birthday even though I have the same birthday as Aoi-nii. I believe that I was alone. Then after so long, I give up. I decided that I would just stay away. 

I wish my prince will come to take me away and save me from this unpleasant situations.

I'm aware there wouldn't be such a Prince in real life. Such thing only happen in a fairy tales book. I still wish for it anyway.

If Ether-sama isn't too busy to listen to my request, please send me a Prince who will bring a change in my life. I promise I'll love him forever. That was my pray every night. 

I know it won't happen but I pray anyway.

Then Aoi-nii changed. 

One day he gave me a big hug and stay by my side. When the invitation from the Royal palace comes for Nee-sama and I, he told the maids not to help me but to let me choose my own dress and do my own make up. I was grateful. The  maids in our house hate me, they said so to me, so when they dress me up they always choose something I didn't like. I don't have many clothes to begin with but I still have yearly dresses that father obligated to purchase for me. I was still this house daughter even if they don't want me to. If father never purchased dresses for me then it would be bad in public eyes. 

Father always purchased a bright coloured dresses for me. All of them mostly in pink, yellow, light blue or white. That's not the colour I prefer but I was grateful. The only dress I like was the dress from a year ago. It was a knees length midnight blue off shoulder dress with silver raindrops beading scattering on the top and with a cute big ribbon tied on the back. I choose to wear a silver low heeled shoes along with it to make it easier for me to walk, in case the maids decided to drop me half way again. I don't know to do make up so I didn't put any and just let my hair as it is. I hope the Royal family wouldn't be offended with my appearance. I heard that your hairstyle is important. 

To my surprise Aoi-nii choose to share carriage with me. I was really grateful. Because of that I arrived at the palace without problem. 

The purpose of this ball is to choose a fiancee for his highness Crown Prince-sama that's why all the daughters from noble houses that still not engaged yet has invited to come. Not coming is same as not respecting the Royal family. That's why I'm also here now. I line up behind Nee-sama. It's just for formality for me being here. That's what I think. 

"I choose her. She is the one that I want as a fiancee. I choose her to be the one that will be allowed to stay at my side" his highness Crown Prince-sama said after I over him my greeting.