Confessions of an Invisible Woman

Chapter Four: Giant Fires of Heaven

As I'm kissing Matt the only thing I can think of in the back of my mind is Jasmine's haunting words deciding to ring in my damn ears. "Be careful he's got a bad rep", "He has a girlfriend every day of the week", "Watch your back". The same old same old bullshit we've repeated to each other since sophomore year of college. It's starting to get to me like fake news you'll more than likely see recycled in social media somewhere – it's played out. You can't even identify the real aspect from the toxic and unnerving lies because it's all just one big cloudy façade that threatens your peace and livelihood. I'm sure we all can agree lately all I've faced are threats to my own peaceful solitude.

Even when she's not in my business as my best friend it stings because she's acted somewhat like a mother to me than my own mom. Mom? Oh snap my mother, Dorinda Lancaster, I need to call her and tell her the great news. She's one of the main reasons why I pushed as hard as I did and if people such as tripping bitches I mean wicked witches like Dean Campbell can't see my vision or potential then I'll need to make it as clear as day.

He stops suddenly and I feel his heat pressing on my stomach as my chest is rising and falling with excitement and adrenaline. He leans down and whispers in my ear, "Make sure you have everything I'm going to walk you home". For a moment I believe that he cares about my feelings and does not want to rush things. Just live in the moment and for once pretend everything in my life is going well. I look around with the campus lights on and I hear the brushing of cars driving by as the Commons is just inches away from the street. The outside of the Student Center is set as if we are at the BET Awards or the Oscars just with everyone dressed in their best business professional attire they have to offer.

I go back upstairs and see nothing but a sea of glaring eyes, intoxicated spirits, and the atmosphere is trembling in happy joy. On the right side I across the room I see Calvin whispering and laughing with Jasmine. I let them both know I'm okay and I'm heading back to the dorm. Jasmine motions for me to follow her to sit in the Commons lobby. She looks dazzling in her tight black dress with stockings and her matching leather Chanel belt. Jasmine has had that belt since her first market at AlphaView and the vendor at the time was selling them with a designer bag of choice. That was also the day I received my first A so it was a good day.

I sit next to Jasmine and I take the moment in – I never imagined how awesome this would feel. We both giggle, "So where did you disappear off to?" "Outside with Matthew". She looks at me almost wanting to fake choke and I roll my eyes at her. I bring up the subject, "He's going to walk me back to the dorm". Jasmine looks at her phone for the time. I glance at it moving my hair out of the way and I see it's 11:42 PM, in a little while they'll start shutting down and cleaning up.

Some of the most powerful entrepreneurs are walking out the door and as they see me, I take turns playing "My Bonnie" and sit down and stand up shaking their hands. After all the least I can do is look them in the eye as I cash their check for my business endeavors. "Well Rasheeda I'm going to spend the night at Calvin's tonight". "Ay behave yourself", I can't help but smirk because as crazy as it is that I can be a third wheel, I'm happy Jasmine is happy with Calvin. He may not be the funniest man in the world, but he does have class and knows how to go out for what he wants. He's supportive and definitely had a weak spot for Miss Frost ever since I introduced her to him from our Accounting for non-Business majors' class.

Jasmine by the way is a Fashion Merchandising major, Calvin is a Chemistry major, and you have me as the Business Administration with a Concentration in Finance.

I hug Jasmine and as the elevator doors close the last, I see of Jasmine for the night is her blonde ponytail swaying side to side. Within the next twenty seconds the elevator makes it to the first floor so I can meet Matt outside.