I'll meet you in Paris || Taekook ✔

Part 15 - Stuck

In the next couple of weeks Jungkook found himself being stuck.

Week 1
The first half of the first week, the only thing Jungkook could do, was being mad. He even threw his phone at Namjoon when they had gotten in to a fight. Now there was no way of contacting anyone. He felt alone, he would never admit it but he needed Taehyung, he needed a friend.

September 26th - Tuesday
'Namjoon! I said leave me alone! I really don't want to talk to you. Why don't you understand that I need some space!' Jungkook yelled at Namjoon from the other side of the table.

'Well the last time I checked this is my house! And we don't have a lot of space, so you'll have to deal with me being around.' Namjoon said back. He was very much done with the youngers behaviour today. He was being rude, selfish and he literally threw his phone at him a couple of hours ago. Namjoon could understand where his behaviour was coming from, but the boy was 17 for gods sake, not 12.

'Namjoon, why don't you understand?!' Jungkook yelled back with dispair in his eyes.

'I do, I do! You miss him right? Well I miss him to, he used to be my best friend. You're acting like I don't have feelings too.' Namjoon said back now in a calmer tone. Yelling wouldn't work with Jungkook right now. The younger was hurt and needed someone to talk to.

'Well I miss him more!' The younger yelled back. Where as Namjoon wanted to talk, Jungkook was definitely not planning on opening up any time soon.

'Don't be so childish, it's not about who misses him more. It's about that we should talk to each other. We shouldn't be fighting over Woosung's death.' Namjoon said.

'Don't say his name! He left me when I needed him. Especially when I need him!' Jungkook yelled at his housemate.

'Stop yelling Jungkook and tell me what's wrong.' Namjoon said with a sad expression in his eyes.

'You know what's wrong! You know how messed up my life is right now, why do I have to say it out loud?' Jungkook again yelled back at the elder.

'You need to let go of your emotions, you need to talk to somebody.' Namjoon calmly said.

'I'm not talking to you.'

'Why not.' Namjoon asked.

The elder was really pushing it to far for Jungkook. Namjoon needed to know his boundaries. They weren't friends, they were just roommates in a kind of way.

'Okey you want to know what wrong? I'm afraid Namjoon!' Jungkook yelled.

'Well what are you afraid of?' Namjoon asked, now walking towards the younger.

'Im scared of everything!
I'm scared to move,
I'm scared to breath,
I'm scared to talk to you!'

'Talk me Jungkook, I can help you.' Namjoon said back. He knew Jungkook was having a hard time, he should help him.

'I'm not going to open up to you sorry, I'm really not. I really appreciate you taking me in your house, but trust needs time.' With that Jungkook left Namjoon's apartment. He wasn't going far and he definitely wasn't going to the centrum in risk of meeting Taehyung. He wanted to be alone and clear his mind.

Week 1,5
The second half of the first week, the only thing he did was sleeping, eating, throwing up and sleeping again. He got stuck in what felt like an never ending cycle. The younger stopt working at the factory, he couldn't get himself to move.
Being hurt was not a function of physical pain people caused him, sometimes he was just laying down, immobilised by the mental torture all the things had inflicted on him.

September 30th - Saturday
'Namjoon?' Jungkook said whilst walking into the kitchen. Namjoon was quite confused about this, as the younger hadn't come of the couch in the last few days.

'Yeah, what's wrong?' Namjoon asked.

'Remember when I threw my phone at you and got mad at you a couple days back?'

'You almost gave me a concussion, so yes remember.' Namjoon answered with a small smile.

'I'm sorry for that. You've been nothing but nice to me this whole week. I shouldn't push you away. You helped me when I had to vomit, you brought me food when I needed it and you worked for the both of us. I'm just an asshole for being so rude towards you.' Jungkook said. And he meant all of it, he had been so rude to the elder and the guilt was starting to eat him up inside. He was just a piece of trash.

'Don't worry about it Jungkook, I know what you're going through. Losing a loved one isn't easy.' Namjoon said while handing the younger the chicken soup he had prepared.

Week 2
The whole second week was by far the worst, Jungkook had gotten insomnia and wasn't able to do anything anymore. Namjoon gave him the big bed, he himself slept on the couch now. Jungkook even came to the point of the thought, to just take all the pain away.
To just end it al.
Its so hard to talk when you're thinking about killing yourself. That's above and beyond everything else, and it's not a mental complaint-it's a physical thing, like it was physically hard to open his mouth and make the words come out. They didn't came out smooth and in conjunction with his brain the way normal people's words do; they
came out in chunks as if from a crushed-ice dispenser; he stumbled on them as they gather behind his lower lip. So he just kept quiet. That were his exact thoughts. He would just keep quiet and not bother anyone. He would go through life as a ghost.

And now almost entering the third week he had enough. Not enough of life, no. He wouldn't dare to take his own life. Not yet anyways. He wanted to visit Taehyung, he wanted to let go and cry.

He also felt extremely bad over the fact that he just left Taehyung without saying anything.
Guilt was taking over him and it had started to drown him.

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Word count: 1058
Song recommendation: Let You Down by NF

Hi! Thanks for reading this chapter😉 Don't forget to comment and vote <3