A Girls Survival Guide

Peer Pressure

Peer pressure? @yalianne13.

All over the world, teenagers have come to terms with the word "peer pressure". There are even times, when we are being pressured, and we don't even realise it. So below are some of the things we sometimes get pressured into doing. When someone asks/tells you to do these things, it's very likely that you are now under going peer pressure:

Dating, Sex Being mean, violence, using the Internet to violate other people, abuse (physical or verbal) so on and so on.

In other words, when someone asks you to do something that you're uncomfortable with or that you know is wrong, then you're being pressured and sometimes knowing that you're being pressured helps you to resist it. Out of personal experience, I know that peer pressure can be very influential. There are various factors that bring about peer pressure, and various ways to prevent or escape it. So without beating around the bush, here are some ways to prevent/escape/control peer pressure going on in your friend's or your life.

1) CHOOSE YOUR FRIENDS CAREFULLY: I'm sure that your Mother or Father has told you this several times, but it's true as hell (and heaven). Friends are not only people who make you smile, but is someone who knows and understands you and has similar interests as you. That way they are less likely to pressure you into doing something that you yourself won't do. Friends also respect your opinions and value them even if they're not the same as your own. Plus, it's mostly those who are close to you that try to pressure you into doing something that's wrong.

2) SELF CONFIDENCE: (read my previous chapter on this topic) this plays a big role in whether or not you're going to be peer pressured, because when you're confident in yourself, then people won't dare try to tempt you into doing something that you don't want to, and even if they do, if you stand your ground, then they won't do it again.

3) VALUE YOUR OPINIONS:

when you value your opinions, then it becomes harder for someone else to blind you with their own. I'm not saying that you should not RESPECT others opinions, just saying that you should always hold on tight to your own.

4)KNOW YOUR OPINIONS: sometimes, truth be told, we are not sure of our opinions unless asked. Try to put aside a time wherein you ask yourself about your views on different topics, that way, when posed with a certain temptation, we know exactly how we feel about it and we know what we would and should do, based on our opinion, and not others opinion.

5) WE HAVE OPTIONS: never feel like when you are posed with a decision, that you only have one option. That is never ever ever ever true. You always have two or more options, but the problem that most of us have is "are we going to be able to live with that decision or is the person that's tempting me going to kill me before I have to?". Truth is, that's not true. Your opinion is yours to hold and nobody has tue the right to make that decision for you, so if the person decides to make you pay for it, the way I see it is that it's better than losing yourself, and it's better than leaving behind everything that's rightfully yours to adopt another person's way of life.

6) TALK ABOUT IT WITH FAMILY/COUNCELLORS: family and friends are considered the cl9sest people to have, so if one of them is hurting you, it's advisable to talk to the other. After all, peer pressure can be a terrifying and uncontrollable experience, but as you'll be seeing in most of my advices, the main thing is that you're the one in control.

Peer pressure may seem a simple matter, but afterwards, when you've got your real self back, it can be full of regret and sorrow, especially if you have a strong conscience.

My story

My experience with peer pressure started when I entered High School. The first thing, was that there was only one person from my primary school who attended the same high school as me, and secondly, I was not prepared for what high school could bring. My first friend (I'll call her Ano - from the word anonymous), had some similarities with me, for example we both liked singing,dancing, the same shows and colours, but she was a slacker. After first term, another girl had joined us, (I'll call her Ny) and I was the one that had introduced her to Ano. So after some time, I began to feel like the third wheel, but shrugged past the idea. Later on, in the same academic year, another girl joined us (Mo) and it was all too much. I know you may think I was jealous (I was a little), but they had more things in common, and I stood out like a sore thumb. It was hard, plus my grades started dropping. I knew that I had to get out. The next academic year, I joined a class club called the untouchables (CHOOSE YOUR FRIENDS CAREFULLY). We were about 19 altogether, consisting of only the "cool girls" so I thought that I needed to be one too (SELF CONFIDENCE). I hung out with them everyday and got presured everyday. I dated guys for no reason and dumped them for no reason. I didn't focus on my school work and I became mean, rude and bad-tempered and closed-up (TALK ABOUT IT WITH FAMILY/COUNCELLORS). Around this time, my-now-BFF's asked me to be their friend (YOU HAVE OPTIONS). I accepted, but I didn't hang out with them. Then my report card came out. 17th position. That was enough to snap me back to reality (VALUE YOUR OPINION and KNOW YOUR OPINIONS). The next term came around and I avoided the untouchables and started hanging out with my-now-BFF's. Even though I had left them hanging before, they welcomed me and miraculously, my grades recovered - 3rd position and working my way up, and I was able to start recovering my true self. It was hard and long and they helped me through it. They taught me to be myself even if the world was against that me. Don't get me wrong, I'm still struggling a little, it's never easy, but sometimes it helps to know that you can never be anybody but yourself and that people have always got your back, even if not everyone likes you. They (my BFF's) are always them, not anybody else, and they never copy anybody else's lifestyles and that's what makes them popular and cool. The fact that they are different. So are you going to make people believe in who you are or are you going to allow people to make you who you don't want to be ?(you can comment your answers and questions). So I want to give a shout out to my BFF's Wudish and Bilki (my nicknames for them) even though they're not on Wattpad (I've been begging them to join), I'd just like to show my appreciation. Thanks a lot to them.

Quiz

Here's a little quick quiz for you guys, it's actually a little riddle for you to solve, so leave your answers as comments. Winner gets to vote! Im kidding :). The winner gets to decide the topic for next week. Deadline: 27th of this month.

So here's the riddle:

"If you look into the eyes of a person looking at a fire, you don't see a fire, you see the flame"

Hmm, tricky. Comment, vote, suggest, tell your teenage friends and enjoy. Thank you and goodnight.