MINE

Chapter 11 - Should we Care?

"So kiss me

There's something in the air

And whether it's love or lust

Should we care?

And bring me, bring me to you

'Cause you bring out the freak in me

It's only for you

Just you"

***

You truly can't have it all in life.

This morning's events reminded me of that. When you start feeling happy about one aspect of your life, usually another challenge presents itself to balance out happiness with some frustration.

As much as I felt hurt, I don't believe Helen had the intention to make me feel that. I don't like confrontations, specifically with people I consider to be friends. What frustrated me the most was that, even after I got out of my shower and calmed down, I still couldn't understand her point of view. How are we supposed to fix things if I can't understand her? Maybe we won't understand each other, and I'll have to deal with that if we get to that point. But for now, I'm trying to focus on positive things.

I've decided to wear a plain white shirt, black skinny jeans, boots, and a black leather jacket. I feel comfortable and good about myself. While I'm waiting for Nick, I get up to look in the mirror. I see that my cheeks are flushed, my lips are plump, my hair looks silky and there are no bags under my eyes... I look fresh as hell. 

Please, to any entity or god out there, just let me feel like this for a little longer.

The sound of my phone brings me back to reality. Nick's here, so I walk out the front door, my heart is beating twice as fast as each step I take and it feels like I'm walking on clouds...My mind is going in circles, and I feel like my senses are on overdrive. The grass seems greener, I can smell the flowers and the ocean, and a hint of Nick's scent as I approach the car. 

When I reach my hand to open the door, it opens from the inside and I bend forward before getting in. I look inside and there he is, with his beautiful smile and piercing eyes. I can't help but smile back at him, my chest filling with joy.

"Hey..." He says winking and waving his hands for me to get in, so I do.

"Such a gentleman..." I say after sitting down and buckling my seatbelt.

"I'm a lot of things... but a gentleman is not one of them. Sorry to disappoint." He says with a wicked smile.

'It's ok. I know all men are trash...' is what I wanted to say...

"I'd have to want something before getting disappointed." Is what I say instead with a sarcastic tone and a grin.

"Ouch... I'll remember that later." He says with a fake offended expression.

I just shake my head and hide my face so he doesn't see that I'm holding back my laughter. We've always had this back and forth teasing each other type of interaction. After he started talking to me that is... But now it feels so different, I can't explain it. He went from being a friend to being all I can think about for these couple of days. It's so weird.

"So, where are we going?" I decide to change the subject as he's starting to drive away from my house.

"To this place that just opened. It's a huge park and it's perfect for the festival coming up in July." He says looking straight ahead with both his beautiful hands on the steering wheel. I don't know why I find him so attractive while driving. I never thought about that with anybody. Maybe I find him attractive no matter what.