Dead.
I wish I was dead.
Dead,
Got these thoughts in my head.
Dead,
I wish I was dead.
My friends text me every other day.
It's the same question, "you okay?"
And it's the same damn lie that I say,
I tell em of course, my life is great.
But ik thinking, what if I died? Would they bring a Bouquet?
Living a life I ain't want, every day a doomsday.
Now Maria comin back, I told her I'm always on stand-by.
Even in the end I'm the good guy, but the good guy, is a sad-guy.
It's hard because we got 2 different lives.
You wanna be doctor and I'm in love with the music, 2 different highs.
I remember the days where you would turn away my hand.
Now the tables have turned, but I dont think that I can.
Buy you know exactly what Ima say, before I even speak.
But theres nothing left to give you now... this heart is weak.
When you left me, my spirit dissapeared into ash.
Now you running back, now you the flash.
But I can see the maturity, I can see change.
And the genuine in your voice... your love... and its strange.
Yea.... man its strange.
Dead.
I wish I was dead.
Dead,
Got these thoughts in my head.
Dead,
I wish I was dead.
When we talked and I said I hated school, I didnt mean I was a drop-out.
I just sped up the time grad 2 years early, hit my school work wit a knock out.
I ain't like anything that traps my mental, are locks my dreams.
And I got big ones. I got lyrics, and sounds, and imagery and schemes.
And when my depression and Anxiety wakes up and screams,
I fight back now. Because you gave me hope. Gaining back my self esteem.
And I know what it's like to love someone who dont want your heart.
And Instead of hitting cntrl alt delete. I hit restart.
And yes to answer, when I wake up, I miss your face.
And it's been sometime, since we been in the same place.
Still remember waking up to your face in the morning.
Than when you left I remember I started mourning.
Now we talking again, and I tell you, you can hit me up when you wanna.
I can be your mans again, and you can be my sugar mama.
I remeber the first that I saw ya, and now I got trauma.
I ain't pick up your first call because I ain't want the drama.
Now I'm calling you, and we talk a lil. Now you one for my genre.
I ain't the type to go back on my words, but now I gotta... I gotta...
So
No matter how many times I get knocked down, I WONT GO DOWN.
I will not let these thoughts make me drown.
I Will Rap, I RAP UNTIL MY VOICE GOES OUT!
So tell me since you cant stop me, what now?
You can knock me down. And at time I may fall.
But I will still move. I will still reach my dreams... even if I have to crawl.
Dead.
I wish my heart wasnt dead.
Dead,
Got these thoughts in my head.
Dead,
I wish I had a heart to give you...
But its
Dead.
