My Heart's Choice (On Hold)

Chapter 56

Dad is at the head of the dining table pouring over the files that Mr Evans has left with us. Mom is by his side, a nervous expression taken over her features. She has her teeth digging into her lips as she looks up from the paper to Dad's face alternatively.

"They don't seem forged," Dad says.

"Mr Evans wouldn't do that," Mom agrees, relaxing for a fraction of a second.

But both of them look stressed for some reason I can't understand. Dad's shoulders are hunched in a tense pose, scanning and re-scanning the documents. I observe them from my position, leaning against the kitchen door-frame. They look displeased despite getting exactly what they want.

Mom and Dad wants to stay with each other. That is the whole reason behind Mom wanting to move to New York. Now they have the same opportunity - to stay together, as a family - without moving to New York. Why aren't they happy?

The thought of Mason securing all these for me, makes me feel lightweight. He has taken a lot off my shoulders and I owe him for that. He has become my knight in shinning armor. I smile at the ridiculous thought. He would like that perhaps - to be referred to as a knight.

Dad look up at me, a line between his brows. I give him a small smile, which he returns, but his face is devoid of emotion. I don't understand why he is not happy.

Mom takes secretive glances at Dad and me. It almost feels like they are hiding something from me.

"Mom?" I take a seat at the table, "This is a good thing, right? We don't have to leave to New York, and you get your job back. I mean you loved that job, right?"

She loved that job. I didn't want her to lose that. It was the sole reason I let Rhea walk all over me. Because her dad had the power to lose my mom her job.

"Yes, honey. That's a good thing," she smiles, reaching over to give my hand a slight squeeze.

"Well then why are you not happy?"

Mom hesitates, looking at Dad for an answer. Usually, Mom is the one to explain things to me - her lawyer skills kick into gear when I ask questions. But today she does not seem to want to talk tell me what is going on.

"I don't think this is a good idea," Dad speaks, evading my question, "New York would have been a better choice."

"How is that? I thought that what both of you wanted was for us to stay together. And now we have it, without having to move," I point out, my brows furrowing.

"Well, Dana, to be completely honest, that was not why we wanted to move," Dad says, his eyes glowing directly at me.

Mom shakes her head, "Maybe we should-"

"She should know, Christine," Dad tells Mom, his voice firm.

They stare at each other for a full minute before Mom turns to me defeated. Her shoulders slump and she leans back heavily on her chair. Dad raises his eyes to meet mine, and I don't miss the look of steel sealing them.

"We want to take you out of here, Dana. That's the reason. You can have a good education in New York," Dad says.

The flicker in his eyes leaves me shocked. Did he just say that? I thought we talked about that already.

"Dad, but you agreed that here is as good as New York," I say, my voice giving out the slightest hint of my nerves that I want to conceal, "New York is not a magic city. It can't suddenly make me better than I am."

I don't know what's happening to me. Dad confirms my fears when he keeps staring at me, his eyes wide. I was not in my nature to argue with what my parents say. But now I want to stay more than ever.

Mason did more than anyone else would bother to do for me. And I can't let all that be for nothing. I can feel the prangs of desperation clawing at the walls of my stomach.

"Dana," Dad's voice is unusually calm, "I did not expect this of you."

"But Dad, I love it here. I don't want to go!"

Mom fiddles with a corner of the table cloth, her eyes not meeting mine. I so desperately want her to tell something.

Anything. She loves her job. She has friends around. Say something! But she keeps silent.

My heart falls when Dad shrugs nonchalantly, crossing his arms in front of him, "You'll love New York, too. In fact I believe that you'll love New York better."

"All my friends are here, Dad. The people I know, those that I grew up with. I don't want to go, Dad. Please."

My hands are shaking, that I ball them to fists under the table. Why do they want to go so badly?

"You'll find new friends. Maybe some better than the ones you know," Dad counter.

Mom gives me a glance, but soon averts her eyes. My heart is beginning to pick up speed. I don't like the direction that this conversation is heading.

"But Dad, I can be sure that I will never meet any friends better than the ones I have here. I mean we are talking about Penny and- and- and Nora, and Dylan! They are my friends!"

"And Mason?"

The room silences. Mason. The one name that can cause relief and terror to wash over me all at once. A shudder passes down my spine. Why would Dad bring Mason up?

I take a shaky breath, "Yeah, Mason too."

"That's the problem here, Dana," Dad leans forward, his eyes fixed on me, "We don't like the friends you mingle with."

My heart skips a beat. What does he mean? No, can't possibly mean that Mason is a bad influence. The apologizing look that Mom throws me, says it all.

"Is this really about Mason?" I ask, my voice shaking.

My eyes sting, but I manage to maintain a poker face, or so I think. By the look in Mom's eyes, I apparently am doing a bad job.

"Yes," Dad says.

I look at him, my mind dizzy. What's so wrong about, Mason?

"Honey," Mom springs from her chair, walking over to me, "you don't know who he is. He's not a good boy."

"How can you say that? I am his friend, and I know him," I say, my voice rising high.

"Dana!"

Mom gives Dad a look that makes him say no more. She has that effect on Dad, sometimes when he starts getting mad at someone.

"Honey," Mom strokes my hair, her voice soft, "you are his friend, and you know him. But you don't know him too well."

"I know him, Mom."

"No, you don't. I've heard stories about the boy. Many people tell me that he's not a good influence."

"What stories, Mom?"

She sighs, taking my hand in hers and giving it a soft squeeze which only intensifies the pain in my chest.

"Most people tell me that he's a bully, honey. That he's running around school bullying girls, and drinking at parties. Acting wildly. He's not a good person to hang out with, Dana. He could hurt you. You can't even imagine what people tell me about him," she shudders.

The pain is spreading all over my body. I find my voice buried deep below a lump in my throat. Dad watches me silently. I can feel his eyes racking all over my body.

So that's the reason after all. If they told me that just months ago, I'd agree wholeheartedly. But Mason is different now! He's a lonely soul that has to be healed.

Mom wipes the tears streaming down my face.

I don't know if feeling the feeling of numbness spreading across my body is because I am slowly dying with the pain. It feels so. I take deep breaths, the inside of my lungs burning with each breath. It does nothing to calm my nerves.

"Moving would be good for all of us," Mom urges, her voice triumphant.

Perhaps she's thinking that she won over me.

That's the last I can take of it.

I dash out of the kitchen.