Lost in Danville

Chapter 6

Perry falls asleep on the couch by Candace's side. They had been watching a soap opera, though at some point, she must have turned it off to go to bed. Usually, someone would have carried him to Phineas and Ferb's room for bedtime. Either Candace just didn't think to move him, or they decided he needed the rest. He wants to go upstairs and lie down with the boys, but he always switches which boy he's lying in bed with every few hours, and he's too tired to trust himself to do that tonight. Instead, he turns the TV back on and closes his eyes. It's just reruns. He doesn't need to watch it to know what's happening.

Within minutes, he's back asleep.

To say he's surprised to wake up to the sound of Major Monogram's voice would be an understatement. He wasn't expecting to ever hear from him again, and definitely not this early in the morning. No one else is awake yet, and honestly, he's surprised Monogram would wake up this early for him. He opens one eye to see the Major on the TV, trying to talk to him. Part of Perry is interested in what he has to say, and on an ordinary day, Perry would sit up and throw his fedora on as quickly as possible. Fortunately, today is not an ordinary day, and Perry doesn't work for OWCA anymore, so he's under no obligation to do so. Instead, he just turns the TV off and closes his eyes.

"Agent P," Monogram repeats firmly.

Perry doesn;t even open his eyes when he turns the TV off again.

"Agent P, can you give me two minutes?" Monogram asks, exasperated.

Perry reaches for the remote again, but if the last two attempts have proved anything, it's that just turning the TV off won't help. As much as Perry would like to just go back to sleep, it looks like he's going to have to wait a few minutes. With a dramatic sigh, he forces himself to sit up, but he doesn't bother putting on his hat.

"Thank you, Agent P," Monogram says. "Peter the Panda told us that you were back to normal."

Perry just blinks at him. How is he supposed to respond to that? He knew it was coming -- Peter would have to explain his missing hat somehow, after all, and Doofenshmirtz did ask him to tell Monogram what was going on.

"Now, I know things didn't end very well last time we spoke," Monogram continues, "but you are still the best agent OWCA has ever had. If you're going to fight Doofenshmirtz anyway, would you like to come back and work for OWCA again?"

Perry hesitates. He saw how quickly Monogram turned his back on him when he needed help the most. That was the whole reason he left OWCA in the first place. But he's also been with OWCA since he was just a baby platypus. That's all he's ever known, and Monogram and Carl have both been there right along with him the whole time. Monogram just thought he was protecting the agency, and though he definitely could have handled it better -- even a fake ID and social security number would have been good enough -- he didn't mean to cause any harm. He's just kind of an idiot.

That really leaves Perry with two choices. He could stay as he is now, heading over to Doofenshmirtz's every day with no expectations but no obligations, or he could take back his old job for mostly-useless briefings, horrible pay, and cool gadgets.

After a few moments of deliberation, Perry puts on his fedora. He's back in. It's where he belongs -- fighting evil next to his animal agent friends.

"Good," Monogram says. "Sorry to wake you so early, but it was the only time I could reach you without your owners hearing. You can go back to bed now."

Perry salutes him before turning off the TV, and as soon as the "meeting" is over, Perry takes off his hat and lies back down. This week was certainly an experience, and, in hindsight, he wouldn't undo it if he could. He didn't know just how much he loved his family and his job and even Doofenshmirtz until he lost it. He got to set some boundaries with Monogram, albeit boundaries that will probably be ignored, because evil never takes a holiday. And, perhaps most importantly, he got to talk to Doofenshmirtz. He'd never even considered that to be a possibility before, and he certainly wouldn't have thought he would divulge any information about himself without a fight. But now, not only does he feel like he's understood now, but he feels like he understands his nemesis better, too. He can honestly call that man his friend, as much as he would Phineas and Ferb or Peter the Panda, and he couldn't ask for anything better.