Dandelion Fields of Gold

This is Me

I don't know how many more times I have to wake up to that blasted alarm clock for school! That's definitely one thing I won't miss when I die.

Yep. Hi. I'm Lexi and this is me.

My life grew into a ball of constant negative thoughts as soon as it was intruded on by a nasty tumor who thought it would be cool to rent an apartment in my brain.

I walk around town and school thinking "screw this" all the time now. I find no purpose in my life knowing that I only have a year left, but I'm just too cowardly to end it sooner.

My parents love me too much and my little brother looks up to me, so I still gotta hold my crap together and pull my big girl panties on to conquer the day.

I grabbed my art supplies and quickly booked it downstairs hoping to avoid the annoying nagging of my parents begging me to eat breakfast.

"Lexi! Where are you going? You have to eat!!! Breakfast is the most important meal of the day, it boosts your brain cells and your metabolism so you can stay awake and energized." Yelled dad through the half way closed front door.

I continued down the driveway and to my bus stop pretending I didn't hear anything.

My dad is a Genealogist and my mom is a Biochemist. Yes. HUGE nerds! Every other word that comes out their mouths has to do with some molecular advancement that dad has been looking at or some weird chemical reaction that occurs in your stomach when you eat oatmeal and apples at the same time.

I admit, I love my parents to death, but I'm not into science like they or my brother are.

My specialty is art. It allows me to relieve my emotions onto paper and close them away into a book.

I constantly draw in my classes, in my room, at the dinner table, and anywhere I can pull out a sketch book. But my most favorite place to draw is in the dandelion field in the forest across my house.

It is my sanctuary.

The humming of the bees in the summer, or the rustling of the tall grass when the wind blows between its strands just keep me in a trance.

The dandelions sway in the breeze and seem to whistle words to me. They waft their scent toward me. Although it's not a pleasant fragrance, it is bittersweet, like life itself. Dandelions are misinterpreted to be weeds. But really, they are just the "human" species of all the plants around us.

I enjoy capturing their different moods throughout the days. They always seem to fit me, always comfort me and understand what I'm feeling.

The day my family found out I had a brain tumor forming in the back of my skull and that I only had 1 year and 2 months left, I had jumped out the car and ran straight to this meadow. I lay in the tall grasses allowing them to tickle and wipe away the tears upon my cheeks. My parents knew where I was so they let me be. I stayed in that meadow for hours, listening to the whispers of the flowers and the breeze as they conversed together.

I think I had even fallen asleep.

****

"Hey, Lexi!"

"Hm? What?" I said in a slight daze not realizing that I was lost in my thoughts again.

"Hey, dingus! The bus is here!" Claire shouted.

"Oh right! Thanks, Claire!" I replied.

We boarded the bus together and sat in the last empty seat.

Claire is my best friend. Has been since the 1st grade. Now we are juniors in high school, still stuck like glue. She didn't take the brain tumor very well either. I would say that she cried even more than I did. Claire was practically my sister and we loved each other to no end.

Resting my head against the bus window, Claire began humming her usual tune of the morning. The hums sounded like the bees from the meadow. I immediately closed my eyes and had fallen asleep.

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