Stray Kids | Imagines

Fear - Hwang Hyunjin

(A/N: This imagine was inspired by the novel No and Me by Delphine de Vigan. It's a very good, bittersweet type of book I would recommend reading.)

*written in third point of view*

She wasn't really sure what he was doing, or why he was even speaking to her. She wasn't sure whether she was really interested in what he had to say, or if it was just his handsome face she wanted to see.

"What is something you fear?" he asked as the chilly, night wind blew, causing the strands of his unusually long hair, for a guy at least, to fall onto his face.

"How are you sure that there is something I fear?" she remarked cleverly, lifting her hands up to brush the hair out of his face. It wasn't clear to her why she decided to talk to him, but maybe she just wanted to continue staring at his unfairly pretty face.

He cocked his head. Y/N. That was her name, a girl he only met a few weeks ago, a girl he couldn't stop going back to. Maybe she was like a drug, or just a sweet something he couldn't get out of his head. A sweet name he wanted to keep on tasting on his tongue as he spoke it.

"Your name is Hyunjin, right?" she asked him again, as if they had not met each other five times already during the past week. 

"Y-Yeah," Hyunjin stuttered slightly, confused by her random question whose answer should have been obvious since day one. It wasn't the first time they meet, but rather the sixth.

"Well, Hyunjin, do you have something you fear?" she returned the initial question to him, not wanting to answer it herself. Just because she didn't really have anything to fear anymore, or so she thought.

But then again, what is there to fear? What is there to fear when you've lived on the streets all alone for majority of your life and saw everything from good to bad? From the so called "bad" deeds or actions, or the so called "good" morals or measures. Everything "bad" from lying to gossiping, thieving, bullying, harassing, violence and even raping. Their is only so much of the good to see from people, on the other hand.

"I guess so," he mumbled, eyes leaving Y/N's face and staring at the ground instead, his mind elsewhere.

Hyunjin wasn't sure why he was so attracted to Y/N. Maybe because she was a bit older than him and different than other girls he'd dated before. But whatever it is, it was random in a good way. He had never felt this way, having a huge urge to get closer and closer to her, just to see where that would lead him, to see her in love with him, to feel that happiness he had always wanted and craved.

Y/N was unlike anyone else he had ever met. First of all, she was homeless. Just a twenty-one year old girl with nowhere to sleep other than the streets. Yet when he first met her, a fateful encounter at a homeless shelter he donated to, he was so enticed to know who she was. Even after her story she narrated to him, he didn't want to let go of her. He wanted to be more than just "a kind guy who donated" to her. 

"What is it you fear?" she continued to inquire, swinging her legs on the bench next to him. 

In Hyunjin's eyes, the greenery surrounding him and Y/N at the park was beautiful. But somehow, Y/N was even more beautiful. Despite her dark tangled locks and grimy skin, or her battered clothes or dirty, bitten nails. Her beauty was indescribable and incomparable, like the stars that blink in the night sky.

"I fear," he spoke every syllable softly and delicately, "I fear the pain of losing someone."

Y/N's lips parted as she processed his words. She tried hard to think of that pain, that pain of losing someone, but she could not make it out. Never has she ever lost someone, because there wasn't anyone who really mattered to her or let alone cared for her.