Honey | HS

【14】

July.

My stomach twisted into knots everytime I thought about him. I felt like someone reached into my chest and ripped my heart out.

Half the time I had felt like I was being shoved under the water and held there. Struggling to get air.

But the only good part was that I had been staying in California for a week and a half now. And I can honestly say, I feel okay being here. It gets my mind off of him, most of the time.

My room was the same as I left it. And the house hadn't changed all that much except my mom had gotten some new furniture.

"Celeste!" my mom shouts from downstairs. Making my way down, I traveled into the kitchen. The tiles are cold against my bare feet.

"Are you ready?" she asks as she looks through her purse. I press my lips together, unsure if I even want to go. This is like the fourth cousin I am going to see. My mom had basically planned it out that I see all my family.

Because apparently they all miss me terribly and need to see me right away.
Just end me now.

Rubbing my face, I head over to the door and shove on my sandals.

Pulling up to my cousins house, I felt like I had stepped into another universe. Another party, another headache.

· · ·

We ended up getting back late. It was after 12 when I had laid down after my shower. I felt sun burnt from spending several days at the beach. It was pretty exhausting, not gonna lie.

Laying in bed is when I thought of Harry the most.

Staring at the ceiling, I wondered if he was doing better. It's been a little more than a month since the last time I had seen him.

Tomorrow, I'm suppose to go to the beach and LA with my old friend from high school. Melissa was one of my closest friends in freshman year before we drifted apart. She had seen I was in town and demanded we hung out and catch up. I'm a bit nervous now.

My eyes shoot open as I hear my phone ringing from the nightstand. I don't even remember falling asleep. The room was still dark.
What time was it?

Sitting up, I pick up my phone and I squint looking at it. My eyes widen as I see who it is.

My eyes dart to the time.

2:21 AM

I furrow my eyebrows. I wonder what has him calling me at this time of night. My mind goes back to the night he had called me when he almost commited suicide.

My heart races as I quickly answer, pressing the phone to my ear. All I could hear is heavy breathing.

"Harry...?" I speak softly.

"Celeste.....you answered. I didn't think you would answer" he croaks out.

He sounds so broken. I close my eyes as his wave of sadness floods through the phone. Making me feel even worse. 

"What's wrong Harry?" I ask as I stare at the wall. Hoping it isn't something serious.

"I had a nightmare" he whispers into the phone. "It was bad and I woke up thinking it was real" he says lowly.

I frown at myself and run my fingertips over the soft duvet cover. "What was it about? if you don't mind talking about it?" I ask, unsure if it was too upsetting for him.

"You" he says and he takes a shaky breath "you got hurt. And I couldn't save you. And you.....you died in my arms" he says and his voice cracks at the end. "I couldn't save you" he adds on a few seconds after.