final round - lrh

one.

Sitting on the couch, I anxiously bounce my leg as it rests on the ground and check the clock for the tenth time in the past five minutes.

They should've gotten back five minutes ago. What's taking them so long?

Perhaps I wouldn't be so on edge if I had heard from either one of them more. However, I haven't heard from them at all which has built up an anxiety inside of me like no other.

Hell, I never knew what anxiety was until they left.

The only time I've heard from them was when they sent me a letter or two back during the first month. Then, eventually, they clearly gave up as I kept writing them but got nothing in return.

It's been absolutely brutal.

Most nights have consisted of my mind wandering off and getting distracted by thoughts wondering if they're okay, or if they're still alive, or if they're in pain right now, anything.

In order to make myself feel somewhat better, I would try to read those letters I received and tuck them under my pillow in order to provide me a simple form of comfort. It's the smallest feeling of them being there with me and even if it's not much, it sure is capable of making me feel a hell of a lot better.

I'm immediately distracted by a loud sound echoing throughout the house and my gaze quickly turns to the door where they should be walking in any minute now. However, I quickly realize it's just my mom in the kitchen.

My shoulders slump as hope had taken over me for a split second and I truly believed it would be them walking through the door with their usual smiles plastered across their faces.

My mom has been preparing to make us all a big dinner tonight in order for everyone to catch up and feel whole again. I know she's been kicking her own butt in order to ensure that this dinner is perfect so everything can feel right for once. After all, I don't know the last time my family felt whole.

However, I'm hoping tonight we can just pretend that things are right and pretend that our situation isn't our reality.

I have no doubt that my brother, Declan, is going to be a completely different person than he was the last time he walked out that door. Not only will he look different, but he just fought in the army for over a year and is coming home a stronger, and braver man.

Declan and I had always been inseparable growing up. We're only a year apart, myself being 22, and him being 24, so we were always in school together, had the same friends, went to the same parties, everything. Because of this, he always has been my best friend.

When he broke the news that he was going to head to the army rather than college, I was heartbroken. I don't think anyone in the family wanted to accept it at first as this was a devastating decision he made for himself.

After all, how was I supposed to let go of my best friend and let him fight in the war? No one's promised a return once they take on something like that. The thought of him not coming home was and still is, unbearable to me.

However, luckily we had received word not too long ago that he'd be headed home today with our best friend, Ashton Irwin.

The three of us have absolutely always been attached by the hip. The second we met, we clicked instantly and everything practically fell into place from there. Then again, it was practically inevitable that we'd all be friends considering our families have known each other for as long as I can remember.

At first, him and Declan were always best friends. They'd run around outside, always play army together, and wouldn't let me play because "I'm a girl" and "girls don't fight in the army." It was a bummer for me because it seemed as if that was all they wanted to do so I just wanted them to try letting me play with them. I wanted to prove more than anything that I could keep up with the big boys.