CHAPTER 41
Lisa's POV
The universe was too huge, I have to admit, I was just a super tiny part of it. Whenever people come into our lives, we should be prepared while seizing the moment; prepared, because at some point, they have to leave. We have to change, we have to grow, we have to discover the meaning of our lives. That's why we have to learn on how to cope up once someone important left. The bible specifically pointed out how important human lives are. According to Genesis, we were the last creation, God created everything for human to cherish and see before he even created Adan. Then Christ came, he sacrificed his life for the sake of humans to be freed from sins. The national heroes who fought for the freedom and sovereign so that you could live your life in your motherland in the most productive way you can, have sacrificed their lives, their dreams, hoping for the future generations to live accordingly. Can you imagine that? too many people have sacrificed for your life. And sometimes, we failed to remember it because we keep on ranting how fucked up our lives were. But then, on my long journey in life, I realized one thing: people have to leave even though they want it or not. Madalas hindi natin nakikita kung ano ang dulot natin sa ibang tao. Are we their ally or their enemies? Mabuti ba ang hatid natin sa buhay nila, o lalo natin silang napapahamak? Pero kahit ano pa 'yan, isa lang ang sigurado. Darating ang punto na kailangan mong umalis, gustuhin mo man o hindi. I smile while looking into the black surface of my vision.
Lisa: Your eyes, I remember your eyes.
I mumbled. I felt Bobby shifts uncomfortably. He was crying. Crying and crying and crying because he never wanted the sin he has made.
Bobby: ....y-you know I don't w-want it.... they just keep on telling me--
Lisa: I know.... I know...
Bobby: ...Lisa?
Lisa: hmm?...
Bobby: I am sorry... I didn't want it to happen.
Lisa: It was all in the past.... I'm sure, she had forgiven you.
Bobby: Ella....
Lisa: Yea?
Bobby: my daughter.... I never got the chance to even hug her before moving away.
Lisa: She was with Jennie. Surely, she's in a good hands.
Naramdaman ko ang patak ng mainit na luha mula sa aking mga mata. Tumawa ng mahina si Bobby kahit alam kong nasasaktan din siya.
Bobby: Three years ago, I have never thought that you, Bam, Seul, and I, would have this individual fight on ourselves. The battle which were created by our imaginations.
My heart feels like stopping when I heard his name.
Bobby: I... I miss him...
Suddenly, I broke down. Three years ago, I gave my eyes to Jennie. Three years ago, she has married Kai. Three years ago.... three years ago.... Bambam died.
Bobby: You think he could hear us?
I chuckled.
Lisa: That dumbass...
I shook my head.
Lisa: He never told me about how his condition gets worse. He have never said a thing that he needed chemo therapy for him to atleast have a chance to get well.
Bambam, he was my companion, my best friend, my right man. Siya yung taong pinagsasabihan ko ng problema, sa kanya ako naglalabas at nagbubuhos ng sakit na nararamdaman ko. But why, why didn't he does the same?
Lisa: It was my fault.
Bobby: No it was not.
Lisa: Masyado ko siyang inabala sa buhay ko, hindi ko naisip na may sarili siyang buhay--
Bobby chuckled.
Bobby: If Bam is here right now, he'll surely punch you.
Instead of undergoing his own therapy, he was with me, he helped me, he became my eyes when I have none. He was my feet when I can't stand. He was my bestfriend. The best buddy I ever had. And now, as sad as being alone felt, he was no longer here.
Bobby: I have to thank Seulgi, Bambam and you. If you three didn't stay by my side when I was depressed, surely I was one of the craziest person now.
I felt his arms around my body. His embrace reminds me of Bambam.
Bobby: If you hadn't came, I surely killed myself.
Lisa: Stupid.
I heard his laugh, I can imagine his grin. I miss having to see the world.
Lisa: How was Ella by the way?
Suddenly, my heart increase its pace as my mouth left the words which was supposed to be unsaid.
Bobby heaved a deep sigh.
Bobby: I think she really misses you.
My heart jumped.
Bobby: Everyday, when I came to glimpse a bit of my daughter's beauty, I always caught her holding this notebook that surely was yours.
Lisa: You idiot! Why aren't you introducing yourself into her?
I tried to act like before yet I failed.
Bobby: It wasn't easy.
Lisa: No one say it was.
Bobby: I'm nervous okay? I'm nervous.
He breathed deeply.
Bobby: How will I approach her? Will I say, 'hey I'm your dad wazzup?'
I started to laugh.
Bobby: or 'hey pretty angel, do you at some point know me? well i'm your fucking dad.' ?
Lisa: Ella hates someone who cusses often.
A knock caught both our attention.
Bobby: Well I guess your nurse is here?
I nodded since I can't see anything. It was too hard at first, not seeing the world, it was hard. But time heals. Time passed. But I still love her even though we are miles apart. I was in the other part of the world, and she was on the other too. The pain wasn't too strong now but it wasn't fully healed yet. If you ask me five years ago if what possible future I could sense, then surely I'll answer you all that I marry the woman I love. I never intended to leave her, but the action I made wasn't even a choice. It was the only thing I knew to not break her even more.
Mina: Thinking of her again?
Suddenly, I heard my nurse voice asking, bobby chuckled.
Lisa: U-Uh no?
Bobby: Stupid.
I have a kidney nurse, since my other kidney was given to Jennie, I have to take care of the other one before having the transplant. I chuckled as I remember that nine years ago, my life wasn't a challenge. It was boring, a fucking useless and worthless life. But Jennie came and made my life a hella of a rollercoaster ride. She was like the fire and I was the ice. She melted me, and brings heat into my surrounding. She'll always be my Monalisa, my woman, mi mademoiselle, mi amoré, my love.
Bobby: I think I have to go now. I'll visit again next month Lisa.
Bobby said before kissing my forehead. I just smiled.
Lisa: You don't have to travel every month just so you can visit me.---
Bobby: Shhh... idiot, we are friends, I want to see you even if you can't do the same thing.
Ginulo niya yung buhok ko.
Bobby: One thing..
He leaned closer....to my ear.
Bobby: ...your sister....she missed you so much.
A tear roll down my cheeks. I miss them.
