Mulligans

3. A Minnow

The children shrieked as they splashed in the cool lake. Stacey looked up from under her large sun hat and Jackie O sunglasses and spotted Birdy in her bright pink bathing suit running away from a little boy. It appeared the class was playing tag.

"Doesn't look like swimming lessons to me," she muttered to herself, arranging her scrapbooking materials on the picnic table. A menagerie of paper-weighted family photos, stickers, paper frames, glue sticks, and scissors littered the workspace in front of her. She picked up the scissors and went to work, her mind playing its favorite game of a free-association stream of consciousness.

Just cut. And glue. Good thing the craft house had the acid-free glue this time. Photos can be ruined otherwise. To think I had to inform them! They're supposed to be the experts on these things. What is wrong with parents these days? Ten years old, and Birdy has already seen a penis. It's uncalled for. Disgusting. What kind of a mother lets her child run around showing their privates? I hope Birdy didn't touch it.... Where was the swimming teacher? I'll have to talk with him too.

Stacey picked up a photo of herself and Nathan from the previous Christmas. She examined her own joyful face beaming back and then grimaced as she looked at Nathan beside her, looking less than thrilled. With a few quick snips she cut out her own image and discarded the rest. Flipping through the holiday pile, she smiled as she found a photo of Nathan laughing. She traced the scissors around her husband and then glued both pictures onto a snowy background where the words "Happy Holidays" glittered above their heads.

There's a reason why people say "make memories." They don't just happen; you have to construct them. Satisfied with her work, she looked out toward the water. Birdy's swimming class was gathered in a circle around their coach, listening attentively. She scanned the little bodies for a bright pink bathing suit but found none. Searching the lake, she finally located Birdy standing a little ways off from her class with a boy her age. Stacey watched in horror as the boy pulled out the front of his shorts and their eyes went down. Her daughter's attention was intently fixated on the boy's bathing-suit region, or where his bathing suit should have been. Jeffrey!

Stacey stood, pulled off her sunglasses, and ran down to the water. "Birdy! Birdy! Get away from that boy!" Without waiting for her daughter to react, Stacey ran right into the lake, hiking her dress up around her hips. "Birdy! What are you doing? You two, come with me." Seeing no other option, Stacey let her dress fall into the water and grabbed a hand of each child, pulling them out of the lake.

"Mom! You're embarrassing me!" Birdy whined as she whipped her gaze to the swimming class and beach crowd.

"I'm embarrassing you? I wasn't the one cavorting out in the middle of the lake, in front of the whole beach." She turned to the boy. "I suppose you're Jeffrey?"

"I didn't do anysing!" he pleaded through his toothless kisser.

"I saw exactly what you did, you little pervert!" Stacey growled back.

"Excuse me? Is there a problem here?"

Stacey was too intent on not letting the little exhibitionist escape to take much notice of the woman who had approached them. "Yes, but I'll handle the situation."

"Well, I'd love to be a part of 'handling the situation.' This is my son," the woman informed Stacey, resting her hands on her bare hips.

Stacey took in the sight before her: a woman of about her age in a bright lime green bikini, jewelry dangling from her belly button. Her complete appraisal of the woman took less than two seconds. "Well, that makes sense. This little nudist son of yours has been showing my daughter his penis."

The woman bit her lip to try to suppress a growing smile.

"You think this is funny? It's a violation of her childhood!" Stacey reeled, anger at the injustice getting the better of her.

"I wasn't showing her my penis!" Jeffrey interrupted. "I wanted to show her a minnow!"

"Minnow. I'm sure." Stacey shook her head incredulously.

"Mom, he's telling the truth. He was just showing me a minnow he caught," Birdy testified on Jeffrey's behalf.

"This is unbelievable. I don't care what we all want to call it, children of ten should not be sharing that kind of thing."

Bikini Woman reached out and tousled her son's hair as if to forgive the whole incident. "Let's just relax. They're kids."

"At this rate, not for long!" Stacey shot back. Something cold and wet found its way into Stacey's hand. She looked down and flinched at the sight of a motionless, slimy little fish, which Jeffrey had pressed into her palm.

"See? I told you. I caught a minnow!" Jeffrey squealed, laughing uncontrollably at the reaction he'd gotten from Stacey and splashing around in the water. Bikini Woman just watched, amused.

"Birdy, grab your things. We're leaving." Stacey took Birdy by the arm again and marched her over to the picnic table. She began stuffing her scrapbooking supplies into a shoulder bag. "I think you've had enough swimming lessons. This afternoon we'll go to the community center and see what other activities they're offering."

"But Mom, I liked swimming."

Stacey planted her sunglasses on her face and led her daughter off the beach, careful to avoid the curious gazes she was sure were following her. "We can't always get what we'd like. We have to enjoy what we're given."