Mulligans

23. An Invitation

Late the next afternoon, Chase was stooped over, rummaging around in the fridge, when Nathan walked into the kitchen. "I was, uh, I was just going to make a sandwich or something. You want one?"

The look on Nathan's face when Chase looked up was a delicate mixture of trepidation and determination. He closed the fridge and stood in silence, not wanting to distract the man from his mission. Nathan took a step closer, and his eyes flickered with fear before meeting Chase's steadily as if searching for his courage within them. "Chase, I...," he started and then paused, looking away as if the words had scurried into the kitchen corner and he had to retrieve them before starting again. "I think that I...."

Chase stepped closer and laid a comforting hand on his shoulder. This time the touch seemed to hit its mark, and Nathan did not shrink away from it. "It's okay. I know." His words seemed to lift a giant weight from Nathan's shoulders. "It's all right. Everything's going to be all right."

Nathan stepped closer, his hulking shoulders slumped like those of a little boy who'd been chastised, and Chase drew him into a hug. They stood there in an embrace and protected each other against the world and all the discomforts that existed outside of the little sanctuary they had created in this kitchen. He wasn't sure what more words of comfort he could offer or how to proceed, and so he remained as he was, holding the man in silence.

It was Nathan who spoke first. "I've never been with...."

"Shhh... it's okay." The words lilted out of Chase like a lullaby as he gently rubbed Nathan's back.

"I have no one else to talk to," Nathan mumbled into Chase's hair.

"Don't worry, I'm here," Chase reassured him, holding Nathan tighter.

Nathan ducked his head and looked into Chase's face, smiling a silent thanks, and then rested his forehead against Chase's. It was a bonding gesture both paternal and shockingly intimate. And then Nathan lifted his chin and met Chase's lips. Gently and so tentatively that Chase barely registered it at first with his eyes pressed closed.

It was an invitation.

Chase opened his eyes and pulled back in surprise. That he might act as a companion and comfort, sure. But that Nathan would be thinking of him romantically had not entered into the realm of possibilities.

And yet... and yet as he looked at the man he knew instinctively that Nathan embodied what he was searching for. The attraction had been palpable since they'd first met. And now here were the seasoned, handsome features he found so desirable in his best friend... a torturous infatuation that would never be reciprocated. And a man capable of bestowing on him the love of a father he'd never truly known.

Chase leaned in and kissed Nathan, a cautious signal that the gesture was accepted. It was fragile and perfect. The men pulled apart and spoke volumes with their eyes, each checking, reassuring, and double-checking as they used restraint in exploring each other through kisses. Neither spoke, both excited by the magic they were creating and terrified any one word might dispel it.

The evening was wearing on, and twilight had gathered her cloak across the yard when Nathan reached down and took Chase's hand, leading him out of the kitchen. Chase kept his eyes fixed on Nathan's back as he followed him through the house and into a room he'd never seen. Nathan crossed to the bedside lamp and clicked it on, giving the bedroom a soft, warm glow. Chase sat down on the bed, watching and breathing in shallow gulps, his chest rising and falling under his T-shirt.

"Are you okay?" Nathan asked, sitting on the bed beside him.

"Yeah," Chase managed to get out. "Just nervous, I guess. And excited. I've never been with... well, anyone either."

Nathan smiled and took his hand, kissing it softly. "You are so handsome...."

"Look who's talking." Chase laughed nervously. "I'm not even sure what to do...."

"I'm sure we'll figure it out," Nathan replied as he leaned in and kissed Chase's neck.

Chase thrilled at the feeling of Nathan's stubble grazing his chin, at the scent of him this close, and at how his large hand wrapped effortlessly around his own. Soon Nathan had slipped one of his hands up Chase's shirt and was exploring his skin. Chase reached out and timidly began to undo the buttons on Nathan's shirt, slipping his hand inside. Nathan's chest was so warm, and he could feel the other man's heart beating thunderously under the palm of his hand. Chase turned his mouth to meet Nathan's. The kiss was ravenous, as if Nathan were the food he'd been craving after a famine. He only pulled his mouth away long enough to stand and let Nathan pull the T-shirt up and over his head.

Chase tore through the remaining buttons on Nathan's shirt and pulled it off his shoulders before pushing him down on the bed and falling on top of him. His breath caught in his throat at the sensation of their bodies colliding, skin against skin. They groped and grabbed each other in a violent and desperate attempt to express a lifetime of repressed yearning.

It was more than Chase had ever expected: more liberating, more erotic, more exquisitely brutal and viciously loving than anything he'd ever encountered. And when they had finished, they lay contented in each other's arms, breathing heavily and desperate to remain undivided.

"You know, you look pretty good in my shirt," Nathan commented, leaning the carton of strawberry ice cream back toward Chase.

Chase dug his spoon in, retrieving a mountainous pink heap. "And you look pretty good without it." He grinned, bumping his shoulder playfully against Nathan's. Chase had pulled on Nathan's button-down shirt and was marveling at how the 2XL swam on him. They sat in reckless abandon together on the couch in their boxer shorts, as if the lake house were a secluded honeymoon suite. "So... we figured it out, huh?"

Nathan laughed and pulled Chase in closer. "I'd say so."

"You said we would," Chase agreed, cleaning his spoon.

"And now that we figured it out, we can keep practicing until we get it perfect."

"If that wasn't perfect, I don't know if I can handle what's next," Chase purred, taking the ice cream from Nathan and setting it on the living room table. He climbed on top of Nathan and began kissing his neck, his lips still chilled from the cold spoon.

"Before round two, I have an idea," Nathan suggested, his voice a low enticing rumble. "Want to take a swim?"

Red and white Chinese lanterns cast a warm glow across the glassy surface of the lake as Chase and Nathan slipped out of their shorts on the creaking dock and jumped in. The chilly water was a shock to their naked skin, and they were soon treading water and clinging to each other to stay warm. Nathan was enthralled to be living so dangerously, completely infatuated with Chase and the new life he represented. He reached out and traced his fingers along Chase's jawline, pulling him in closer. "It's amazing...."

Nathan petted Chase's lips with his thumb, marveling at their fullness. "I've been dreaming about a moment like this all my life, but I never thought it might actually happen."

Chase smiled coyly. "Well, was it worth the wait?"

Nathan nodded with a smile and pulled Chase into another kiss. Moonlight cut across the lake as they turned around each other in the water, savoring the serenity of being together, the safety of their privacy and the protection it provided from the big wide world that would say this was wrong.

Slam!

They turned abruptly to look up toward the cabin, hearing a car's doors being pushed shut, the echo cutting clear down to the lake.

"Shit. Somebody's here," Nathan uttered nervously and began to swim for the dock. After pulling himself onto it, he grabbed his clothes and ran up to the cabin without another look back at Chase.