My Delicate Sunshine |COMPLETED|

Him As An Eye Opener

Months had passed and I continued to live life the way I wanted before I met the man that changed everything. I was happy. I get to earn money for the future. I told my mother about the plans to live in Manila alone pag kasya na ang ipon ko. She was okay with it. She supported me with my plans and I became happier. I was still avoiding my friends, especially Seb.

Of course, may parti pa rin ng puso ko ang hindi masaya dahil hindi ko parin magawang humarap sa kanila. Gusto ko kasi na kapag humarap ako sa kanila, wala na akong naaalalang tao, wala na akong kirot na nararamdaman at wala na akong dahilan para umiyak ulit. I was really hoping for that day.

One day as I was strolling on the mall, department store to be exact. Napadaan ako sa baby stuffs. It got my attention. I stared at the baby stroller for almost a minute and thought about adopting a baby, but, Lege crossed my mind and it pained me that we are never gonnna be a parent of the same child.

Someone stopped in front of me which caused my attention to divert to that certain someone.

"Shine!" she hugged me so tight at doon ko lang na realized that it was ate Christine. Legend's older sister.

"You've become more beautiful. Iba na talaga pag naka move on na." she complimented me with a great smile.

I just laughed. I never thought I had grown up more beautiful and I never thought I looked like i've already moved on. I looked at her cart and its full of baby stuffs, confusions got into me. Hindi ako bobo para mag hinala ng mali.

"Oh these. You're wondering why i'm buying these though I don't even have a boyfriend, anak pa kaya." She gigled. I remained silent, I don't know what to say. I looked rude but I tried my best to smile.

"These are for my niece. Ela is 3 months preggy. Lege requested me a favor since Ela's pregnancy is delicate. She cant shop for their baby and he's even busier on his job."

"Oh." I said. I tried to hide the disappointment in my tone but I know my eyes showed it all.

She stopped and held my hands.

"Im sorry." she apologized and I saw how she really mean it.

"Okay lang po iyon. I'm all right, im fine." I smiled and excused myself before my tears fell.

I ended up crying in the bathroom. Sinubukan ko naman na maging handa sa ganitong mga balita. After the wedding, hinanda ko na ang sarili ko. Siguro dahil nalang sa pag nanais na mag ka baby at malamang magkakaanak na ang lalaking minamahal ko. My feelings got mixed up and it maybe the reason why I vented out crying hopelessly on a public bathroom.

Umuwi kaagad ako. Ni hindi ko nabili ang mga damit na bibilhin ko sana para sa sarili ko. I entered the house with full of walls on my real feelings. Pero kahit ganoon, nasabi ko parin sa mama ko ang nangyari.

"Anak, this news. I think, this is the sign that you have been waiting for. Alam kong sobra sobra na ang ipon mo and you can even use it to live abroad. Pero palagi mo lamang sinasabing kulang pa iyon dahil alam kong may hinihintay ka. At yun yung araw na sinasabi ko sayo noon. Ang araw na maalala ka niya. Ngunit eto, he is going to have a child, to have a family. Maalala ka man niya ngayon o hindi, a family isn't worth ruining. Especially you. You are not the kind of girl who wouñd ruin a family. So anak, I know this is the best time to leave...."

"If coming back didnt heal this." she pointed my chest where my heart is placed. "Then leave again."

I let my heart be numb with the pain. I agreed with my mother. Ni hindi ako umiyak ulit. Niyakap ko lang siya ng mahigpit and thanked her for being such a great mother in the world. I wished to be a mother like her.