Long Shadows of Old Sins

Chapter 35

                        Mehek fainted in his arms. Probably due to exhaustion or emotional outbursts. Shaurya swiftly carried her to bed and called doctor.

After few hours, Mehek gain conscious. Shaurya was beside her and took good care of her as per Doctor's instructions. Mehek wanted him to stay away from her but was too weak to fight him. So she decided to shut and pulled herself into her shell. She didn't respond to Shaurya or his attempts to make her converse. She understood that he was trying his best to make amends. Yet she remained adamant as she knew their relationship has not future.

A day passed away. Her silent treatment was killing him. Unlike Mehek, Shaurya was not a strong person. He was losing his sanity and on edge of breaking point. So he sat beside Mehek's bed and decided to bare his mind even if she ignored him.

"When I heard news that you eloped, I couldn't believe it", he started to pour out. Mehek heard him but didn't show any response. "I was running around asking people whether they have seen you. I asked Vikram Uncle and my father to call Police to report missing complaint. For few hours, I behaved like a mad man who kept on chanting that Mehek will come back and she cannot leave me. Finally one tight slap from Baba made me realise that you were gone for real", he sighed recalling that fateful day. "I was shamed before world. Pitiful eyes followed me everywhere. Then after few weeks, Rishabh came and his revelations were final nails to my coffin. I lost my sanity completely and fell into depression. Baba took me abroad for treatment".

Shaurya looked to ensure that Mehek was listening. Though she didn't show any inclination, she heard it all with a heavy heart. 

"I am far from normal, Mehek and still on medications. Even after several years of treatment, I couldn't completely gain my balance. I was trying to stay alive without living. Baba's sudden death left me alone. Then Swati insisted me to come back home and take care of our business empire. Work was a good diversion and Swati supported me a lot but I was always unwell. I couldn't lead a normal life. I couldn't move on. My need to have a family, have someone to love was never fulfilled because I was impotent and mentally damaged", he drew a sharp breath. 

Mehek turned her eyes to him. When he realised, she was acknowledging his words, he continued, "When Swati got pregnant from Shashi Gupta, to save her from shame of being an unwed mother, I married her. I expected a chance to have a family with my best friend and her child. But then Swati passed away giving birth to Diya. I was pushed into darkness again. I couldn't even be a good father to Diya".

"Then I came back to your life", Mehek spoke abruptly, "And you made it your mission to destroy me. You acted wicked and then played the nice guy. I was too gullible for your lies and fell in to your bed, only to be ravished by your revenge". "Half truth", he agreed while she knitted her eyebrows in confusion, "when I told I wanted to forget our past and be friends, I really meant it". Mehek scoffed in disbelief. "Please believe me, Mehek. I was losing my mental balance. Forgiving Shashi Gupta and trying to be a good father for Diya calmed me. I realised my hatred was destroying me. In an act to help myself, I extended friendship to you. It was not an act", he sighed, "Night in the cottage was never planned and it changed everything".

Mehek looked away to blink away her tears. Truly that night changed everything. "I was deprived of physical satisfaction for long, Mehek. I didn't regret it next day but craved for more. I realised i was never impotent but my body & mind needed you. Without giving a thought about future of our relationship or your feelings, I decided to pursue an affair with you. I was selfish to core but never had any intention to take revenge on you by using your body. My need was controlling me", he explained his best. 

Eventhough his explanations were bizarre, Mehek knew they were not lies. Mehek smirked at him, "So you decided to reward me with material goods so that I will keep servicing you in bed. Win-win for both sides. Money for me while pleasure to you. You are a good business man, Mr Ahlawat. In few hours, you promoted me from friend to mistress". Shaurya had no defense against her taunts. "It sounds so vile when you put it that way. And I feel terrible thinking about the way I treated you. I was sick and you were my cure. It was a desperate act", he sounded hapless.

"What changed?", Mehek wanted to ignore him still curious to know. "I came to know that Drishti was not your daughter", he told calmly, "It shook me to core. All balance I had gained in my fool's paradise were lost. All I could see was your betrayal. I believed you were using Drishti for your benefits. Gaining sympathy while pretending as her mother", he paused while balling his fists at his own folly, "My heart wasn't content and my soul screamed for revenge. I became disturbed and even work didn't distract me. Then finally when you confronted me for emotional commitment , I decided to give me my final strike and get my revenge". Mehek gave a small laugh and said, "Good for you, Mr Ahlawat".

"Mehek", he blocked her path when she tried to get away from him, "nothing happened between me and Archie. It was all an act". "I don't care", she lied and tried to walk away. "Mehek, please forgive me", he apologized. Her heart was squeezed and she found it hard to gather words. But she had decided her path and there is no turning back. "There is nothing to feel sorry for, Mr Ahlawat. You wanted to break me but in turn it broke me away from my guilt", she looked into his eyes, "So at the end, it did good for me as well. I am no longer a prisoner of guilt. We are even now. I hurt you and you hurt me. Scores settled. Deal done. So now let's shake hands and part our ways".

"I don't want to", he wasn't letting her go, "I can't". "Have you heard even a word? We have nothing amidst us. Not even revenge or resentment", she shouted at him. "Then let's try to start afresh. From scratch", he held her shoulders, "please give me a last chance". Mehek wanted to but it was too difficult. "I can't", she sobbed and then told firmly, "I won't".