When wrong feels right

When You See The Past: Chapter 8

Bugg POV

I just stood under the shower head, I feel a numbness that I'm not used to. Like it hurts so bad that I feel nothing at all.

She's gone

No more Sunday dinner or late night talks

I remember the talk me & Grams had about me quitting the game. "Joey, this life isn't one to life for & definitely isn't one to die for", was all that echoed in my head.

I'm so sorry. Its all my fault.

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I squeezed her locket that I put around my neck, I really don't give a fuck if I look gay. I don't care right now. I just want her back.

I was terrified to see my family because it had been so long since I seen them, since my grandmother hid me for all these years after my Dad died. The reason I got in the gang is because I needed a way of protection. Thats what I got.

I walked in & sat down in the front of the church just staring at the casket, guess I was too distracted because all my family surrounded around me & I had no clue

They started speaking that Spanish shit that I never cared enough to learn, I live in America

They were all excited to see me, saying how handsome & older I've gotten.. But I only seen one face through the whole crowd. Connie. My little sister.

"Oh shit. I gotta go, I'm not ready to face them" I thought to myself as I got up attempting to leave

But when I looked up, our eyes connected & hers began to water. I swallowed hard

I walked out.

She began to follow.

I got in my Benz and pushed the gas as far as it would go to get as far away as possible.

Why I ran away ? Well thats an easy question. It's hard to face reality. But Im a thug, moms a pig. We both are embarrassed because our kinds hate each other. Don't get me wrong I love her & Connie but I just can't risk my life or there's. My grandmas dead. I won't cause the death of anyone else. I can't

Im not the Joey they remember, I'm Bugg now, a cold killer.

But now that my Grandmother's dead, I'm reconsidering everything