Not Your Therapist

Part 1

Breathe in.. Breath out. You're just another mistake. She didn't love you. "I don't love you Ed... We like each other but I don't love you. I need a break.. Please understand."

Ed Shaw was standing on the railing of the bridge, his hands holding the pipes behind him, standing on an inch of foot down. Staring down at the water, he breathed in. This is it. No one ever loved me. My mom, My dad, My love. Why was I even alive? If no one cared? Why was I working so hard and struggling each day when there was no one to care or care about me ? What difference does it make if I die or I am alive..? No one would know  if someone as worthless as me would disappear from the world.

Ed breathed in deeply while he was looking down at the flowing water. It was way past midnight and no one was on the road. He silenced his thoughts, with two bottles of whiskey. He was drowned in self hatred and guilt. He was standing there all alone, sobbing while he was about to jump to end his life. 

"Um...You know right? If you jump from there. You're not gonna die. Maybe break some bones but not die. " Ed startled on the voice, bringing him to reality. Ed turned at at the voice sideways, he was shivering with fear with tears. He saw an lean, tan guy in well dressed clothes holding a bag. He was sweating, maybe he was running ? Why is he talking to me? He kept his distance while he smiled at me slightly. I looked at him the turned back at the water. 

"I am serious.. That jump won't kill you..Why don't we find a better height for you to jump off from ....? " He said looking at me with a smile.

"What.." Ed turned back at him, confused. What was he talking about. Maybe was right? 

"SSeriously.. Give me your hand. I'll pull you. We can find a better place to end your life. I promise.. This will just hurt you even more.. " He said leaning in, giving me his hand. 

I looked at him. "What...What..." I was beyond confused. I was standing in the middle of no where and this guy was helping me to get myself killed. Seriously ? Shouldn't he be stopping me ? But he was right, if I did get hurt badly. I would suffer. I wanted to end this once for all. 

Ed turned slightly grasping in fear while he grabbed the man's hand firmly and pulling him further with fear and force. He grabbed the man's hands with both of his hands. The man then grabbed his waist and pulled him off the railing making them fall on the ground. Ed was on top of him while the man held him firmly. Ed noticed his eyes, he had a hazel eyes. For a minute there was silence when Ed got up abruptly and stood away from him. He smelled a good perfume on the man, maybe he was rich. The man smiled while getting on his feet. 

Ed felt a bit bad, he extended out his hand for him to help get up. The man looked at Ed and smiled, he grabbed his hand and stood on his feet. They looked at each other for a moment when Ed became awkward and pulled his hand away. There was something weird about him. He was way calm and composed. He was not awkward. Why ? 

" I am sorry.. I didn't mean to" Ed said looking down and walking away from the spot. He didn't look at the man. 

Soon, the man paced up to him to walk beside him. Ed looked at him. "What you doing?" He asked the man being confused

"Getting you at a place where you can end your life peacefully..." He smiled at Ed

Ed narrowed his eyes, he followed the man. They walked in silence. Ed glanced at the man now and then, he was lean, muscular with dark brown hair and hands shoved in his pockets. He looked from a well to do family. His bag on his shoulders. Why did he want to help him die ? He shrugged. Little did he know, that the man was smiling at him. Looking at him with a smile. He stopped at the cliff. Ed looked down, Wow that's really deep. He looked at the man. The man smiled and stepped few steps back. He then gestured him to jump and smiled. Ed was confused. He didn't wanna jump oddly. This little time taken to think while they walked changed something. He wasn't in that impulsive act anymore. He didn't want to end his life. Maybe this man wanted that..

Ed looked down and then turned back at him. The man looked at him with crossed arms. Ed stepped down, he took some steps back and turned around to walk away. 

"So I think you have changed you're mind. " The man said grabbing his arm when he past by him. Ed shrugged his hand away from his arm.  

"Why did you bring me here.. What did you do..." Ed said looking at with a serious face

"I just pulled you out of an impulsive act... and made you think... kept you in silence... You did the rest. " The man crossed his arms and smiled at him. Ed huffed and walked away. 

The man turned and shouted at him. "Death is easy. Living is harder. But also beautiful.. Once you see that you can feel it too. " 

Ed stopped and turned back, the man pointed towards the sea. Ed never saw past the cliff. He saw a beautiful sky and sea with a waves. He walked to the edge to look at the scene. It was really beautiful. He took a deep breath and started crying while he sat on down. 

The man walked up, and sat beside him. Ed covered his face while he cried. He felt the man's arm over his shoulder. " Let it all out... You will feel better.. " Ed looked at him, he smiled. They sat there for long time until Ed spoke up. 

"Thank you..." 

The man smiled looking at the stars. " Life is so much more valuable.. We end it for invaluable things and people.. Ironic isn't ?" He turned to Ed. Ed looked at him, he was right. 

" You should go to a therapist. Talk to someone if you have no one to talk too. I know some are stupid but some are really good.. Okay?" The man looked at Ed.

"Okay." Ed replied while he looked at the sky. Maybe he was right. Can I give life one more chance ?