Not Your Therapist

Part 30

Josh POV

It was the next day and my house felt empty without Ed's presence. Even though, Kevin was my life. Without Ed my life felt incomplete.

I was in a gloomy mood. I dressed up Kevin for school and he was sitting on his dinning table, eating the cereal, I served him. I continued to pack his lunch box while lost in my thoughts in silence.

"Papa?" I heard Kev.

My head turned towards my little boy, he looked at me worriedly.

"Yea? You don't like it? " I asked him as I walked towards the table and kissed his head.

He shook his head in denial, "Then what's wrong? " I asked him while sitting next to him. I wiped his mouth with my finger. He brought his small hand on my chin, cupping it tightly, pouting.

"Why is Papa sad? Is it something I did? " He asked with round eyes and I just melted in his eyes. I was awed, taking him in my arms and carrying him and placing him on my lap, closing my eyes and hugging my son tight.

Oh god, My son. Never let anything bad happen to him. Ever. Please.

"Oh god, Kev... You did nothing honey. I am not sad, I am just missing someone... But I have you.. Right? You love papa? " I asked him pulling away and cupping his chubby cheeks.

He nodded widely with a smile. I smiled too. I leaned in and kissed his cheek softly.

"Papa loves you so much...that Papa doesn't even know... " I said with a emotion I never knew I had in me. It was an emotion of unconditional and selfless love.

"Do you miss Ed...? " I heard his small voice.

I looked at him, smiled and pinched his cheek.

"I miss him too. I like him Papa.. " He said with a smile.

I smiled wide, "I like him too.. "

After, Kev went to school. I went home filled with love, My son loved me so much and I am so lucky to have him in my life.

I sighed, I took my receiver of my landline and dialed Ed. It went to voicemail.

"Hey, This is Ed. I am unable to talk to you right now. Leave a message and I will get back to you. Bye. "

"Hey... It's me. Umm... Just called to.. to.. ask you, how are you? Okay. Call me.

Umm.. I miss you.

Okay. Bye. " I disconnected my call with a sigh.

God, two weeks. How? Just How? How will I sustain for two weeks? I was filled with sadness but I knew today that I shouldn't let it effect on Kev. I can't let him know I am sad or sulky. I don't want him to be worried or sad, like now.

My day went as normal and I picked up Kev from school. Our day went in a rush. My phone had died and I wasn't very bothered. Ed didn't call me back and I didn't dwell on it. I knew he was busy. So was I, even though I thought about him and missed him.

Kevin kept me occupied. It was late at night and Kev was fast asleep in his bed. I took a shower and poured some whiskey for me. I didn't drink often, but today I needed a drink. I sipped my drink slowly as I went to the landline and pressed the notification button. 

"You have 45 messages. Please proceed to press 1 after the beep. " The automatic robotic voice said. 

My eyes widened. 45 messages ? I pressed the button and there it was. All messages from Ed. Every single one of them. I cupped my mouth in shock. I heard each and every one of them as they came one after the other.