sunshine // l.r.h

6.

during my earlier conversation with luke, we briefly mentioned our favourite artists and our general music taste.

luke's reply of 'artic monkeys' definitely didn't come as a shock to me, however, my reply of 'one direction' definitely shocked luke. he went on a slight rant about how boy bands are cringe worthy and that their songs are full of clichés. i would be lying if i said it didn't offend me but i wouldn't let it show. in an attempt to defend the 5 boys i had grown to love in the past 3 years, i gave luke recommendations in order to change his opinion of boy bands for good.

due to this, the feminine featured boy also gave me recommendations, claiming that he wanted to put me on to some 'good music'.

i had heard of the band luke was referring to but i never really cared much for them.

after hearing about my lack of care, luke practically ordered me to listen to a list of songs. he stood behind me, watching over my shoulder, pointing out all of his favourites and making me add them to my queue.

the list consisted of: 'do me a favour', 'r u mine', 'i bet you look good on the dancefloor', 'do i wanna know' and 'florescent adolescent'.

the trip home was far less boring than the one i made several hours ago, considering the fact that i actually enjoyed the songs luke suggested. i found that i actually had to refrain from playing the air drums or air guitar on multiple occasions, to avoid public embarrassment.

i hated to admit it, but, luke's taste in music was much better than i expected it to be.

my mood quickly turned sour however, as i made the turning into the cul-de-sac i lived in, realising that i'd probably have to deal with a confrontation from my father.

my worries were brought to life when i stepped into the porch, seeing my dad stance- bulky arms crossed over the front of his chest, on the other side of the patterned glass.

taking a deep breath, i erased the only barrier between my father and i, instantly regretting it.

a firm amount of pressure was applied to my helix so rapidly, i didn't even realise what was happening for a solid couple of seconds.

an aching soon replaced the feeling of pressure as i now stood in the living room rubbing my ear with a pout.

the older man ordered me to sit on the dark leather sofa in front of him, putting on his best demanding voice and i complied, not wanting to cause any more trouble, knowing that it would just end up worse for me anyway.

"where have you been? who have you been with? why didn't you tell me where you were going? why were you out for so long?" the questions come flooding in.

i remained silent, waiting for the stocky middle aged man to calm down. he didn't though. my silence seemed to aggravate him further as he continued his attack.

"did you really think you could get away with it huh? you really thought you could slip past me without me knowing? you're just like your fucking brother!"

i was taken back by his final statement. it hurt me knowing that he thought of me this way seeing how he developed such a strong hatred towards my older brother in the few months before he died, i never knew why he did but i did know better than to question my father and his antics.

probably looking like a fish out of water, i widened my mouth- shutting it a moment later before opening it again. i was practically gobsmacked.

taking notice of my astonishment, my dad raised his voice again, saving me in the worst way from the repetitive cycle i was in.

"whatever you were planning on saying, save it, i don't want to hear it. from now on, you will respect your mother and i. i'm sick of you thinking you can get away with things, malachai was the same and look what happened to him! i don't want you leaving this house, you hear me? go to your room, i can't stand to look at you right now."

not in the mood for fighting back, i obeyed my fathers orders and scurried up the stairs to the substantial room that i grew up in.

before my thoughts could race any faster than they already were, i lunged to grab the familiar white cord that was gifted to me not so long ago, plugging the small buds into my ears as i began to wail.

warm, salty tears painted my face as i laid comfortably on my side, slowly drifting off to sleep.