i can see your scars ~{changlix}~ Finished

12

(Unedited as always)

Changbin p.o.v:

I was about to talk to him some more until the bell rang and everyone started moving. While i wasn't paying attention Felix had just dipped and left me behind in the crowd.

Gosh darn it.

I tried again on the way to our shared second period after our boring first period lesson, but he ran away again. Then third was just a repeat till we hit lunch. He wouldn't be able to hide during lunch....right? There's just no way! There would be a swarm of girls and to much time. Plus Jisung would be here. And Jisung can find anyone he wants. It's actually really scary.

I decided to wait for jisung before looking for Felix.

"BOO!" jisung said attempting to scare me. I turned around un phased and lazily replied with, "ah." He frowned. "At least try to act harder."

I put both my hands up and once again lazily went, "ah."

He just looked at me with fake annoyance.

"Anywho have you found Felix yet?" He asked quickly changing his tone. I nodded.

"Yes, but i think he's avoiding me..."

His eyes just widen in disbelief. "Are you for sure? He's been all over you though?"

My face crinkled in disgust. "Ew don't word it like that." I said pushing him farther away from me. He just stupidly giggled.

"Come on lets go find him!" He said grabbing my arm dragging me across campus to find the freckled boy.

Felix p.o.v:

It's been hard avoiding him but I've managed. I haven't only been avoiding him though, I've been avoiding all of my friends. I get why I'm avoiding Changbin, but i don't know why I'm avoiding everyone else. I just feel so scared for no reason. Maybe i fear being judged. I'm not sure but now that it's lunch I'm scared that that they'll all find me. But maybe it wouldn't be so bad talking to any of them. Maybe chan and them will be nice and understanding. Maybe i misunderstood what was going on between Changbin and jisung.

At that moment i felt an surge of confidence wave through me. I looked up to go try and find Changbin. I found him immediately. He was looking for who i assumed was me. I smiled and waved just as his head was about to look over at me, but suddenly i saw Jisung come from behind distracting him. My confidence levels plummeted below sea level and i felt like any sunshine left inside me was shot down by the dark rumbling rain clouds threatening to pour out and fill me with water droppers at any moment.

Of course i only said the word maybe.

Suddenly i heard whispers. I felt as if i was being watched and every eye in the room was on me judging my every breath. I turned around but surprisingly for the first time, there was no one whispering about me. No one was even looking at me. My world started rapidly spinning and my vision blurred. My throat went numb and i suddenly couldn't control my breath i sat down again starting to tear up and lean over holding my stomach. The eyes felt worse and the whispers sounded louder. Soon all the colors started to merge. I felt like passing out and throwing up at the same time.

I-I need to get out of here I c-can't breathe. I stood up and ran to the nearest exit bumping into a few people. I needed to be alone. I ran to the nearest open janitors closet and luckily found an unopen water bottle. I slid on the floor trying to catch my breath. I drank some water and it helped me feel a lot better. I was so shocked and scared of what had just happened that i curled up into a ball on the floor and cried. I didn't care if people where looking for. I didn't care if i was late for class. I didn't even care if i got in trouble. I just want to sleep now. I'm so scared of what I'm capable of. H-Have i gone insane? I curled up tighter and slowly drifted off into sleep. It would be the most peace that I'd get in a while.
(A/N: btw if you didn't get it, it was a panic attack. Those suck)

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I was being shook awake. What the- where am i. My eyes felt swollen for some reason.

"Hey kid wake up." Suddenly everything vividly replayed like an old cassette tape. My eyes opened some more as i was still being shaken of course. I looked up at one of our schools janitors.

When he saw my puffy eyes he sighed. "Look Kid, i won't tell the principal, but next you cry at least go to the nurse and get an excused absence. Also school ended 20 minutes ago." My eyes widened. Olivia. I quickly stood up bowing and saying thank you then rushing off to find Olivia. I didn't even go back to class for my forgotten backpack.

I ran and ran. Even when i was running out of breath i kept going. If a guardian is late to pick up a student at Olivia's school, they call the parents. And at the top of that parents list for Olivia, was our abuser. When i arrived at her school it was to late. It looked like abandoned ghost town. I teared up bending over for the second time that day. "SH*T" i shouted not caring if i was in front of the middle school or not. I ran home. I ran as fast as i could. I busted through the door but it was too late. As soon as i opened the door he laid a hand on Olivia. That was the first and hopefully last time i truly lost all control.

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(A/n) my friends have been trying to find my account since i starred so I've been hiding. Istg if they find it I'm deleting this account. Anywho none of this was planned so ooooooo cliffhanger 🥴🥴

Q: what's your favorite new b-side on the album?? I have like 5.

June 23rd 2020
Tues.
2:31am
(1071 words)

~
d.m.

(I'll give you my ugly feet pics if you buy me the new skz album) ((jk...or am i??))