Need you (Dixison)

16.

Youth by Daughter (slowed)
Addison's Pov
       Today was going to be hard, I already knew it. It was Monday and I finally had to face Dixie. This weekend had undoubtedly been the worst days of my life. I rethought the situation over and over and I couldn't stop replaying it in my head no matter how much I wanted it to stop. It didn't. What did I do? I thought maybe I was good enough, but I'll never be good enough. At least never for her.
I roll out of bed and walk sluggishly to my closet. I grab some jeans and an oversized hoodie. I could care less about what I look like. I tug at the chain around my neck. Even after everything I just can't seem to take it off. It's like it's a part of me.
       I pull it from the neck of my hoodie and bring the tiny metal heart up to my lips. I used to do this when I missed her, and right now I was missing her more than anything.  I shook my head at all the thoughts starting to circulate. I decided it would be best if is just went downstairs and make some type of food.
         My parents and brothers would finally be home today after they had been gone for 4 days. The house was really lonely this weekend, but what else could I have expected in this empty house.
        I grab a random granola bar and head to my car.
Dixie's Pov
      This weekend were some of the roughest days I've had in awhile. My hands were completely destroyed from punching anything and everything. My hands hurt but that never stopped me from punching the next thing. In fact my wall was a horrible sight to look at. There were dents from my knuckles scattered everywhere. I just genuinely didn't care anymore, I lost the most important thing to me. My angel, and to say I was hurting was an understatement. I was torn. I didn't mean to hurt her, I really didn't.
       I rolled out of bed looking for the one thing that made me feel close to her. The necklace. I walk over the drawer where I keep my jewelry and look through it. After a minute of search I fish out a chain with a metal heart on it. For some reason I bring the heart up to my lips and keep it there for a bit. I don't know why I did it, I just did. I open up the drawer with all my clothes in it and pull out jeans and a long-sleeve.
Addison's Pov
       I walked into the busy hallways and made my way to my locker. I open it and started to get my stuff when I just froze, I remember the last few times I was here.
Flashback
         I feel a pair of arms wrap around my waist. They pull me  closer. "Guess who?"  She whispers.
         "Hmm, let's see who could this be? Oh! I got it, I think that this is the most attractive girl in the world. Her name is Dixie D'amelio."  I reply.
         "Well you got me there. But most attractive definitely goes to you Ms. Easterling"
I turn around in her arms and give her a soft kiss. I hear one of the boys whistle jokingly.
"Fuck you." She laughs flipping the whole group off.
"Good morning baby." Dix says kissing my cheek.
I knew I was falling, but I was falling harder than I thought.
"Good morning love." I smile.
A few hours later
"Hey Adds, ready to go." She says leaning against the locker next to mine.
        I shut it and walk off.
       "Addi, talk to me." She continues to try and talk to me, I get into the car and ignore her further.
End of flashback
       "Hey Addison!" I hear someone yell from the doorway, and see none other than Dixie D'amelio. 
        I start walking to my first class pretending not to hear her.
        "Addison!" She yells from behind me.
          I feel a firm hand being planted on my shoulder preventing me from going any further.
        "Let go."
       "No, we need to talk. I love you adds, and I can't lose you." She said voice faltering in between the sentence.
       "Don't call me that. Let me go."
       "Look!" I watch as she tugs and chain from under her shirt.
          I freeze once she pulls it all the way into my line of vision. A chain with a metal heart on it. The necklace.
        I was too shocked to think.
        "Addi please, I was telling her I only want you. I want you. It's you. I know you and char are friends and you're close to her, but I want to be the only D'amelio you want, the only one you need. Please baby listen to me." she says so that only I can hear..
         "Just let me go." I say coldly.
         She obeys and let's go.  I speed down the hallway to my class.
A few hours later
Dixie's Pov
       It was lunchtime and I was walking to the my locker to drop some stuff off, when I saw the most unusual sight.
      Addison and Avery talking. I walked closer and stopped to listen from a distance.
      "Avery leave me alone." Addison says.
      "What bitch got a problem?"  Avery says stepping close to Addison.
        "Leave me alone dumb ass,I don't have time for your bullshit. Now leave."
        "What did you just say to me?"
         "I said leave me alone." Addison says sounding pissed off.
      It seemed as if they had been arguing for a while.
      I saw Avery raise up her hand as if to slap the blonde haired girl. Before I realized it I tackled Avery to the ground and started punching her.  
      Of course the traditional group of random people who were at every fight were there watching as I beat the fuck out of her.
       "Leave her alone!  This is all your fault! I love her and you just couldn't accept that. So you had to ruin the only thing that ever made me happy." I shortly stop to yell.
In this time she takes her chance and throws a punch and lands it. I start to feel blood gush out of my nose. That bitch.
"YEAH SHE MAKES ME HAPPY NOT YOU!" I start hitting her again.
       "Dixie! DIXIE STOP!" I heard Addison yell from behind me.
       "I fucking hate you!"
        "DIXIE PLEASE STOP!" She yells while sobbing.
       I then felt and familiar pair of arms pull my off of her. Griffin.
      "Watch yourself bitch! Don't ever go by her again!" I yelled as Avery stumbled off the ground and way from me.
      "Do you hear me! NEVER TALK TO HER AGAIN!" I yelled and she stumbled out of my sight.
      I look over to see Addison sobbing.
     "Let me go." I say and he does.
I wipe the blood from my nose and run over to the sobbing blonde.
Addison's Pov
      She rushes  over to me  and pulls me into a close hug. I feel her plant a small kiss on my  forehead.
      I feel myself relax in her arms before thinking. " NO! SHE CHEATED DON'T GIVE INTO HER!" I mentally scream.
       "Adds, I'm sorry. She's never gonna hurt you again. I promise."
        I place my hand on her chest and push her back.
       "Leave me alone." I walk away.
"FUCK!" She yells punching the lockers.
I noticed her hands were bruised and her knuckles were raw, meaning she had been punching more things then just Avery.
I felt a pang if guilt in my heart as I kept walking away. After everything I just hoped she was okay. I pulled the necklace back out and placed a kiss on the heart once again.
A few hours later
Dixie's Pov
I'm not worth it. I shouldn't be here anymore. You're a horrible person. Just off yourself it'll make everyone happier. These thoughts swirled my head the past few days and I was trying so hard not to give into them, but it hurt. It hurt so fucking much.
Why did she have to move here? why did I have to fall in love? why do I have to be alive? I don't want to live anymore.
       It was 7th period. Usually I would be excited to go to that class, but even the thought of being in the same class as her was too much for me. So here I was laying down and the top of the bleachers with a more than half smoked cigarette held in my hand. Usually I wouldn't smoke regular cigarettes but occasionally I needed something stronger than my vape. Not to forget but just the feeling of my lungs burning. It was something I oddly took comfort in when I was in a bad place.
       I pulled my hand up to my mouth again and took a long drag and let out a slight cough after.
Addison's Pov
       I skipped 7th period because I didn't feel like I could be in the same room as Dixie. I was making my way to the bleachers to clear my head. I was almost there when I saw a figure stand up and throw a cigarette in the trash before lighting another. It was a girl, but not just any girl. It was Dixie Jane D'amelio. I felt a single tear fall from my eye, she told me she would quit. She told me if I didn't like it she would stop for me and she didn't.
Dixie's Pov
      I noticed the figure of a girl standing on the ground looking at me. Oh shit she could snitch on me.
        "Hey you, i know you know who I am. Don't even think about snitching!" I yelled down at her.
         "Really because I feel like I should!" She yelled back.
       Oh shit. That voice. It's Addison. I'm so screwed.
       I dropped the lighted stick to the ground and crushed it with my foot before running down the bleachers to her.
       "Addison I promise it's not what it looks like." I say.
        "Oh really it's not. So you weren't just smoking. God Dixie, how many things are you gonna lie about?" She says obviously hurt that I broke our promise.
       "Baby just listen to me. I just wanted to feel something."
       "Don't fucking baby me! You just keep lying Dixie. Why do you keep doing this to me?" She whispers the last part.
      "I'm sorry Addison, I promise I'll quit for you, please Addi. I'll quit for us. I'm gonna fix everything. I can't lose you." I say dropping to my knees.
       "No Dixie, there is no way to fix us. Maybe there shouldn't have been an us in the first place."
"Please don't give up on us. I DIDN'T CHEAT ON YOU! I COULD NEVER! BECAUSE IF I DID THEN I WOULD LOSE THE BEST THING THAT EVER HAPPENED TO ME! ADDI PLEASE! BELIEVE ME, i didn't cheat." I say breaking down
"Then what were you doing huh? Just having a friendly little chat with your ex hook up. Do you think I'm that stupid?"
"No, I was telling her I only wanted you, and if I could go back in time I would have had the discussion in the public hallway. I just didn't want problems. Please you have to believe me. Addison Rae Easterling for this once I'm just asking you to just trust me." I say broken-heartedly.
"I'm sorry Dixie I just can't trust you." She says walking off.
And just like that, my last bit of hope was crushed.
Word count: 1935
Missed me? Sorry for taking so long I went to the beach with my family. But anyways thank you guys for 18k. I appreciate it so much, I apologize for any errors.