Consequences Of The Heart.

Chapter 22: I'm Here...

"Today, we will begin the year with a very important and extremely vast topic: Human Transfiguration. We will be continuing this topic in full next year but it accounts for around 25% of your grade so I thought we would start with the basics at least." Professor McGonagall made her way around her desk and toward the blackboard, writing down two words that for all I knew, she had made up: Crinus Muto. "Crinus Muto. Who knows that this does. And please, by the Order of Merlin, someone other than Mister Lupin and Miss Evans." I crane my neck to look at them seated at the back of the classroom with their hands raised, chuckling internally at their predictable nature. "Ah. Mister Black." I hurriedly craned my neck in the opposite direction toward her desk in front of me when I realise I had my hand in the air. When the hell did that get there? Luckily, I had to take Latin classes when I was young so I could make a half-educated guess.

"Something to do with your hair?" There were a few sniggers around the classroom, which I honestly thought were rather rude but whatever. They were just insanely jealous.

"In technicality, yes. You're correct." The suppressed laughs died down. This was why Minnie was my favourite teacher, no matter who you were, she helped you. Whether it was giving you a cookie to cheer you up, letting your students become animagi to help their werewolf friend or even just twisting her words so that you aren't embarrassed in class in front of people you knew. She was just cool. I also noticed James as looking at me weirdly, and it didn't seem like it was because I just had my hand in the air. Truthfully, I missed him. A lot. And I know people would say 'if I as in your place, I would totally go back' but it was way more complicated that the average deduced. But no matter what I am going through -which is a lot that I don't want to focus on right now- missing the full moon was unacceptable and I felt horrible. I can't imagine what James must have gone through. And I know that those times of the month are all about Remus' pain but not many people know what James goes through. He barely sleeps, going over the worst case scenarios and of course the insane amount of chocolate he takes with him at dawn to the Hospital Wing. And to think, I betrayed my duty as best friend by not being there to calm him down and for that -no matter if he forgives me- I could never forgive myself. 

Missing the full moon was the last straw I could endure with Amelia. As much fun as it was having non-stop sex with the hottest girl in school, her asking me to drop my life and my friends? How did I ever agree to that? Because you were trying to make yourself straight remember! Memories of that night on the Astronomy Tower came flooding in. Remus' date, the sexual foreplay, the boobs that I had learned to tolerate, the guys. I was so confused and I was not dealing with it well enough.

"Siri? Are you okay?" I snapped into reality to see McGonagall writing down notes while most copied and James sitting in the empty spot on my desk on my right, looking at me with worried orbs.

"Professor, may I be excused?" James tried grabbing my hand as I stood up, not waiting for a response. I just had to get out of there and fast before anyone saw me cry and I lost what little credibility I had left in this school. I rushed out with my bag in no particular direction; just as far away from anyone I knew would be sufficient. I felt the warm sting on a droplet roll down my cheek as I found myself in the second floor girls' lavatory. I dropped my bag in one of the dry sinks and leaned against another. I looked up catching sight of myself in the broken shards of mirror. The rust was retreated enough to make out the tear trails that overflew every few seconds as I remembered myself. 

I was so absorbed with how miserable and pathetic I looked to even notice someone had come in. "Hello, hot stuff!" I closed my eyes in preparation for what was coming. "Is ickle baby crying?" The high pitched voice almost had me deaf in the ears.

"Not now, Moaning Myrtle!" I looked around to see the translucent figure of Moaning Myrtle standing before me, laughing uncontrollably. It was times like this when I was upset that I couldn't strangle her to death with my bare hands.

"Myrtle, could you excuse us a minute?" That voice, I did recognise: Remus. Myrtle turned around to see him enter just as I did and started floating around him flirtatiously before disappearing into the tile below.

"Is there anyone who doesn't like you?" I tried to lighten the mood but he didn't smile. I could tell he was not in the mood to laugh. There were things about him I didn't notice before for some reason that I noticed on first sight now. Like how he didn't wear a shirt under his school jumper but a white T-shirt instead or how his caramel curls created a cute cloud-like illusion over the side of his forehead. But what surprised me the most was how I saw he had missing scars. I extracted my wand and pointed it at his face. I don't know why, but he was completely still and unfazed but curious. "Revelio." As I pulled my wand away from his face, a brown powder was dragged along with it like a flock of tiny birds flying in perfect harmony and synchronisation. "Are you wearing makeup?" 

"I was, until that." He grabbed his wand too and re-applied it with a trembling hand. I figured it wasn't a secret most knew. "But I'm not here to talk about me." Of course, I should have known it was coming. It was only a matter of time. "You and I aren't my closest but you are still one of my best friends and more importantly, so is James." Oh.

"So he sent you?" I spat back causing little bubbles to ruin his makeup. 

"No. But I've come for him. He's obviously taking it the hardest, and I get that you don't want to talk, but please. Talk to him. You'll be surprised how much good it will do you to say what you want to say to the people you love and whatever you're going through, it will help you get past the first stage that you are clearly in: denial." He spoke calmly but I could tell he wanted to say something else, on his own behalf.

"Re. You don't get it." 

"In the near future, you will find that I do understand having a big secret and being scared of it. Besides, as much as I don't like guilt-tripping on serious occasions, I am still in more pain that I should be because you weren't there yesterday and so, you owe me. And if you still don't want to talk to James in fear he won't understand..."

...I'm here."

Word Count:- 1242

Love, Kale.