Consequences Of The Heart.

Chapter 32: Aftermath

I awoke with a pounding headache that harnessed enough pain to strike fear into the heart of Ares on his most evil of days. I pulled the fluffy duvet over up my unclothed body that was swarming with an uncomfortable mixture of sweat and other 'bodily fluids'. I clutched the side of my head in agony, my fingers combing themselves through my caramel locks. I scowled at the throbbing. I squinted hard enough to catch sight of the rest of the room. In Sirius' bed, he slept, the temptress who caused my hungover state, but as the brief memories returned it seemed clear my hangover was the last of my worries. Sirius was sprawled -in all his beautiful glory- over his four poster, but was covered by his blanket. He was of course, the first thing that caught my eye. Peter's bed was completely empty, but James' bed had a slender and unrecognizable figure sleeping soundly. It was a girl: Alice. I should have figured, she was always found passed out on someone's bed.

I stood up, halting for a few wasted seconds to regain my balance and stop my head from spinning with a passion. I sway over to the bathroom; I needed some rest and relaxation. I practically collapsed against wooden bathroom door. I hurriedly shut it again behind me, leaning on it. My breaths were getting audibly heavier and the sweat that stunk up my hair also increased by a visible amount. I clutched my torso in illness and stumbled forward toward the centre and tripped over myself, falling face first onto the open toilet seat. I felt the liquid contents rise up to the base of my throat. I coughed up the remnants of the ethanol consumption I partook in last night.

I stood up and went back to the sink, washing out my mouth. Honestly, I didn't usually have much of a gag reflex -which actually turned out to be a blessing to think of it- so barf never really bothered me.

I turned the faucets on to a comfortable temperature and watched. I watched the way the small streams ran down the white surface, its ataraxy soothing me. My shoulders slumped over in serenity as I observed the calm waterways as they created their own individual paths, not waiting for anyone else to carve out their own tracks. Oh, how I envied their independence and individuality. Spectacular. I wish I could proudly be my own person, knowing there were people who loved me, knowing they loved me for me. But I couldn't. No matter how much I knew that needed to, I couldn't. I wasn't ready. Not for five years, not now, maybe not ever. And it was heavily depressing, but that's just how it was. It may seem hard for people to understand, but no matter how incredibly decent I looked, most insecurities never go away, no matter the methods. And believe me, I tried all the methods.

The bathtub's water filled up to the brim and so I turned off the water and slipped into the warm pillow of solace. This will have been the best part of my day. Pure perfection.

After I had finished all I needed to, and the migraine that dominated my optimism had softened its control, I made my way down to the Common Room where I saw something interesting. James and Peter were cuddled up on one of the loveseats. James shifted uncomfortably -perhaps a random nightmare, I have them all the time- whereas Peter looked like the happiest rat in the world. But I had no time to wait, it was almost ten minutes to when breakfast at the Great Hall would begin. And that meant I was 20 minutes late for my daily rendezvous with Lily. SHE WAS GONNA BE MAD! I didn't have time to even question the two love animals, I simply ran out of the portrait hole and toward the Great Hall. I took whatever shortcuts I remember without actually looking at the Map, but it didn't help much. Thankfully I arrived with five minutes to go to a very upset Miss Lily Evans.

"I'm so sorry, but I have big news to tell you! That makes up for it right?"

"How big?"

"So big that it's embarrassing for me and I almost don't want to tell you."

"That big!? Oh Merlin, tell me!" She started jumping up and down in her seat as a few students began tiredly coming into the Hall, shoulders slumping with the weight of the early hour.

"I slept with TJ." She stared at my whispered response in confusion and hung bewilderment, but I answered before she could even ask the question. "Well, I was drunk, you know which was YOUR fault. And then I remember TJ dancing with me and then, some more...awkward positions that I'd rather not say." She gasped out a naughty smirk and wiggled her constantly suggestive eyebrows.

"Did you bottom?" Merlin, help all that is bad and evil.

"LILY!" I whisper-screamed and slapped her hard on the arm. Of course she didn't even flinch at the light pain; I couldn't slap very hard. "But no, I didn't."

"You know, that was totally worth the 25 minutes I wasted doing absolutely nothing." I watched as the Marauders -immersed in the crowds- stumbled into the Great Hall. Ignoring James and Peter, Lily and my eyes were drawn to one thing: the infamous Sirius Black. His flawless, dark hair was pulled back into a messy bun, with a few perfect strands sticking out in perfectly planned blueprints. But his unconditional beauty wasn't the reason he now drew the attention of every single person in the Great Hall, actually it was the numerous love bites that littered the length of his fabulous neck. There were the expected responses from all the girls that I could hear like 'Who did that to him?' and 'Lucky bitch' and other really rude ones that I ignored. I don't get it, I was just as jealous -if not more envious- of him, but I didn't voice my opinion!

"Wow Siri, which girl got the better of you last night?" James sounded less light-hearted and more anxiously curious.

"I have no idea, but she was probably another crazy." I had only heard tales of the sexual and mystical adventures Sirius' girlfriends had taken him all, in fact I wish I hadn't heard some of them, it was almost like they were made up. And they were disgusting.

"Why do you say that?" Peter questioned. He was less enthusiastic than usual but like a buzzing bee compared to the rest of us subdued sloths.

"Well for starters, my ass hurts like crazy!" Excuse you. Did he just s- what.

"Hmm kinky." James shrugged it off. This was really bad.

Oh fuck me, I just fucked Sirius Black.

Just my luck.

Word Count:- 1157

Love, Kale.